ASYLUM - For all mankind

Who Is This Girl?
The Chive has the answer. (The Chive)

Sacha Baron Cohen and Jemaine Clement in "Men in Black 3"? (Screen Junkies)

The Top 10 Most Cowardly Programs in College Football (Bleacher Report)

Extreme Twister! (I-Am-Bored)
10 Most Charming Gestures
Woo the ladies old-school-style. (AskMen)
The Price Is Creepy
A montage of Bob Barker's early days. Do you think he's creepy? We don't. (Buzzfeed)
50 Things People Want to "Save"
Certainly all these things can't need saving. (Maxim)

Required listening from the week in music.

Gorillaz, the best animated band since Cold Sliver from "G.I. Joe," returns with "Plastic Beach." The guest roster (which includes everyone from Lou Reed to Snoop Dogg) is typically motley, while songs (like the groovy, '80s-throwback single "Stylo") remind us that summer is just around the corner. Still, the characters look kind of creepy when rendered in CGI for Gorillaz' latest video. Sometimes, it's better not to cross the uncanny valley.

Also in stores:
-- "Broken Bells" finds The Shins' James Mercer collaborating with the prolific Danger Mouse, of "The Grey Album" and Gnarls Barkley fame. While the result is pleasant enough, we are far more interested in Danger Mouse's collaboration with David Lynch and the late Mark Linkous of Sparklehorse, which may finally see the light of day this summer. (Listen to a streaming version here.)
-- "Are You Experienced" is just one of the many new deluxe, remastered Jimi Hendrix releases hitting stores this week. Sadly, 43 years later, we are only kind of experienced.
-- Barnstorming indie-rock favorites Ted Leo and the Pharmacists return with "Brutalist Bricks," a set of politically charged arena anthems. Ted Leo fans will want to check out the "The Best Show on WFMU" pledge drive to hear some acoustic tracks by the band and discover some of the best comedy on the radio or any medium.

Our happy hour fact to amaze your drinking buddies with.

People who engage in idle chitchat are more unhappy than those who have profound conversations.

Researchers bugged a group of volunteers with hidden recording devices and listened in on all the conversations they had over a four-day period. The study subjects also took personality and well-being assessments.

Not surprisingly, the more a person talked, the happier they tested. In addition, the researchers discovered that quality of conversation mattered: The happiest participants were twice as likely to involve themselves in meaningful conversations and 33 percent less likely to engage in small talk, when compared to the unhappiest subjects.

Regardless of their disposition, those unhappy small talkers can be a great source for up-to-date weather information. And don't act like it isn't weird when some sunny, cheerful dude tries to casually engage you in a profound conversation.

Recent films such as the upcoming "Clash of the Titans" flick have re-imagined the fictional kraken monster that roamed the seas of Scandinavia. But what if the kraken was a real-life beast that dwells in our oceans?

Resident trend expert Ryan Mckee believes the infamous, colossal squid may be more sinister than previously thought. Should we be scared of a day at the beach for reasons other than sharks and European men in bikinis? Should we avoid spring break and strolls along the sand? Watching McKee's latest video could very well save your life ...

We'd like to believe that this Solarfan from AmbienTec has some sort of killer ninja capacity, but sadly, all it does is harness the power of the sun to charge your gadgets (via USB).

These are actual working, tiny, flexible solar panels that put out an adorable 2 watts of power. (By comparison, the roof at the West Coast Asylum test lab is an array that churns out 2,300 watts.) If you charge your cell phone in direct sunlight you'll be able to make a 3-minute call after 10 minutes of charging.

This Solarfan costs $250, which is also roughly the cost of a fully charged, spare phone.

Yes, Virginia, there really is a Miss Turkey Trot and Drumsticks Pageant.

Every October, the little town of Yellville, Ark., hosts this bizarre Thanksgiving-turkey-themed festival.

Basically, girls get dressed up in one-piece bathing suits, cover their faces and boobies with two-thirds of a ridiculous cardboard turkey painting and parade around before a large audience and a handful of stern-faced judges.

The idea is to focus your attention on the contestant's "drumsticks" -- i.e., spray-tanned and lubed-up gams. Man, how much are the feminists going to love seeing women literally being treated like pieces of meat?

Keep reading for more on this bizarre event and a video from a new reality show on the pageant from TLC.

Nobody likes a cheater. But there are some situations that are almost impossible to resist. Let Asylum's token girl tell you why we feel sympathetic toward guys who cheat, even while we're smashing your Xbox with a hammer.

Great news! There are more videos on the Internet of people falling off and/or onto trampolines than there are hats in Canada. (That's completely untrue.)

But as with most things in life -- people falling off one of these bouncy deathtraps just isn't enough.

Sometimes we need to add a little something to freshen things up. A dog here, a basketball net there. Anything to make the inevitable disaster just that little bit more comical.

Keep reading for FAIL feats the likes of which you'd never dare dream.

This week we bring you a woman who looks great on a beach and footwear that might get women on the beach to at least look at you.

We make no guarantees, however, that the striking Dasa will give you the time of day if you sport metal-detecting sandals.


Dasa
Pro: Can hula dance.
Con: Admits to being a good liar, so her hips do lie.
Pro: Casual dresser -- attends brunch in gym shorts and a sports bra.
Con: She's single, which means something has to be wrong, right?

Metal-Detecting Sandals
Pro: Search for buried treasure sans giant, clunky metal detector.
Con: Looks like a police ankle monitor.
Pro: Sandals are comfortable.
Con: Only one sandal has metal-detecting properties, meaning you'd have to hop on one foot to find buried gold.

Hit the jump for another look at Dasa. Your eyes (and other parts) will thank you.

I recently interviewed NBC Chief White House Correspondent Chuck Todd as part of a series of interviews with my WH colleagues on a range of topics related to journalism, such as the effect of opinion media on White House briefings and the relative merits of Twitter.

As a hopeless pop-culture junkie, my favorite question is the one related to their embarrassing TV-watching habits. Granted, covering the White House leaves little time for recreational TV, but the range of answers to this question has been disappointingly narrow.

They either don't watch TV (yeah, right), watch whatever their kids watch, or watch "American Idol." (The statute of limitations for being embarrassed about "Idol" ran out years ago.)

Chuck is a notable exception. After an attempt at the "kid's shows" gambit, he fesses up to some polarizing likes and dislikes. After the jump, find out why this is such a burning question, and watch Chuck's answer to it.