In case you haven't realized that everything has been going fantastically for Hillary since Barack took the lead in the primary races, we'll explain to you what she's trying to say, quote by quote.

For instance, after recently losing three straight primaries, she buoyantly declared to an audience: "Now is the exciting part!"

Her reassurance was almost is as convincing as Kevin Bacon at the end of "Animal House," screaming amid the anarchy, "All is well...ALL IS WELL!"

Here's Hillary on:

Looking forward to the Ohio and Texas primaries on March 4.
Hill reassures: "I absolutely am looking to Ohio and Texas."
Translation: "After next week's expected losses in Wisconsin and Hawaii bring my slump to 10 straight, I think a defibrillator would be a waste of electricity."

Being a good loser:
Hill high fives Barack: "I want to congratulate Senator Obama on his recent victories and tell him to meet me in Texas. We're ready."
Translation: Please don't come. Just let me win one more lousy state and die with dignity, you greedy bastard.

After losing eight straight states, Clinton's campaign manager, Patti Solis Doyle, suddenly departs.
Comment from a Clinton advisor: "She's not being blamed or nuked. She wanted to step aside."
Translation: "We couldn't figure out how to successfully nuke her, but man, did we ever look into it."

See more translations after the jump.

Speaking to a nervous crowd after losing three straight primaries.
Clinton's notable comment: "This is the exciting part of the campaign."
Translation: "Oh yeah, barreling headfirst into my second national humiliation is what I've always wanted."

How she differentiates herself from Barack:
Repeated mantra: "I am in the solutions business. My opponent is in the promises business."
Translation: "If anyone can figure out a solution to this Barack business, I promise you a cabinet position in my administration."

Stump speech moment:
Hillary proudly declares: "I'm tested. I'm ready. Let's make it happen."
Translation: "I'm exhausted. I'm ready to cry for a week. Let's make a deal for V.P. with Barack."