As the recent flare-ups in the presidential campaign have shown, America's still pretty messed up when it comes to race. Even though we're not naive enough to think such problems can be fixed by a blog post, we'd like to do our thang to bridge the divide. That's right, like Pepé Le Pew, we're lovers, not fighters. Ergo, we'd like to tell you boys who want to be lovers a few things you've been saying to the sisters that you shouldn't.
We can't tell you the right thing to say, but Jennifer Fields and Alexis Stodghill --- two African-American women from the office who date all colors of the rainbow -- are about to school the men of this world (white, black, Asian and Inuit) on the worst things you can say to a black woman.
This advice won't help you get a date with Beyoncé Knowles or Kelly Rowland, but at least you won't get a drink thrown in your face.
10. "I was raised by black people." (If your nanny or butler was black when you were growing up, you do not pass as an honorary black person.)
9. "Black women are so sexy." (You may think this is a compliment, but it's just another form of stereotyping or fetishizing African-American women.)
8. "Can I touch your hair?" (Don't ask anything about the hair, or whether you can touch it. Such an exchange will never end well.)
7. "I only date black women." (You think you're going to impress her because you're down, but saying that just makes it seem like black women are a "type.")
6. "You're the black Audrey Hepburn." (Don't tell a women she's the black version of a particular white woman. Men do not say to a white woman, "You're the white Condoleezza Rice.")
Read the Top 5 things you shouldn't say (after the jump).
5. "I don't see any difference between the races." (You may think you're Ghandi, but you're not.)
4. "It's not like you're the first black woman I've dated." (Yeah, that comes off as creepy fetishizing, too.)
3. "You look like En Vogue." (It's never a smart idea to compare one woman to a group of women who all look very different, no matter their color.)
2. "Black women are so much cooler with sex than white women." (If you think implying black women are looser than white women is gonna get you some, you're wrong.)
1. "I'm voting for Obama." (Millions of people are voting for Obama. It doesn't make you that cool.)
Are there other things that should never be said? Let us know.
Also check out Things That Can Doom an Interracial Relationship.
In coming months, look for Things You Should Never Say to an Asian Woman; Things You Should Never Say to a Tall Woman; Things You Should Never Say to a White Woman; Things You Should Never Say to a Latina; and Things You Should Never Say to a Redhead.







































Comments:
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Thursday 17 April
By eetrib
Well what can we say to 'get' a black woman/?
Reply
Sunday 04 May
By Jef
The same thing you'd say to ANY woman...
Friday 18 April
By Web
I love how you recycle your hair!
Reply
Friday 18 April
By Web
I love your hairy legs!!
Reply
Friday 18 April
By Web
I love your hairy legs!!
Reply
Friday 18 April
By Heather
NEVER say...
"you're the hottest black girl I know"
"you're so hot for a black girl"
"i don't usually like black girls, but you're really hot"
...or anything along those lines. I've had different variations of this said to me and I truly don't understand how anyone could see that as a compliment. Also, don't asking if a black woman is mixed with something else because you think she has "good skin (complexion), "good hair", or "nice facial features."
Reply
Wednesday 23 April
By K. Green
Millions aren't voting for Obama in PA!
Reply
Wednesday 23 April
By bethanygd
you wouldn't take a white girl out and make remarks about her being white would you? same with black, hispanic and other not white women. the list is just stuff that pisses us off most.
Reply
Sunday 27 April
By Kamica Morris
Never say your reason for liking black women is "the booty", not only is it stereotypical but it is taken as more of an insult than anything else. We're more than booty.
Reply
Tuesday 29 April
By Iynx
If you feel you need to be making a statement about a persons race or racial characteristics then you probably shouldn't be saying anything to them at all.
Black women are just women who happen to be black. Most women want to be complimented and fussed over not because they fit into a certain race but because they themselves are special in their partners eyes.
I don't think there is any reason with saying "Can I touch your hair?" That shouldn't be a problem, and if a black women has a problem with a man saying something like that to her then maybe it's her that has racial issues. People stroke their lovers hair all the time. So what only a black man can say these things to a black woman?
Also, for the first thing not to say, what if the person was fostered or adopted by black people. (Since I wasn't aware the majority of people in the world had nannies and butlers). Is there some reason why a person can't state the truth without a black person becoming offended?
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Tuesday 29 April
By norybebe
pls don't ever say "you're so hot because of ....(whatever body part, hair and face included)...are you mixed?". ?I've had this said to me and I gave him an ex's number and insisted he call me that night, when I knew my ex's fav team was playing. He called and I hear my ex made up new insult words for the crank caller disturbing him. And I also gave a fake name.
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Thursday 01 May
By chris
You cant say ANYTHING to black women without offending them. Just dont date them. Why would you want to? With that fried kinky, nasty hair.
White women are better. Period. Because WE are the only ones with different color eyes, eyes the color of the sky, green the color of earth, hazel the color of topaz. Hair that is all different colors, and silky. Only Oprah has white hair, and it costs millions to upkeep.
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Friday 02 May
By Not so stupid chris
What a rational creature you are...you sound like a problem i know that can never be treated or cured ! ur points well taken. Loser, living in the 1800' with no education. never dated in life besides you and your hand on that tiny thing you always search so you can scratch...Big A***
Friday 02 May
By Dok180
The woman I date is cute, rides with me on my busa, has a pretty smile and likes my likes. She just happens to be black. A good looking woman is a good looking woman reguardless of what color they are!
Reply
Sunday 04 May
By don hardin
You claim you are:
"Two African-American women from the office who date all colors of the rainbow -- are about to school the men of this world (white, black, Asian and Inuit) on the worst things you can say to a black woman."
I never met or dated a woman of "other colors" that were at all sensative to things said about their race or color. What has made you so deserving of such fragile treatment?
And which of the ten "can't says" applied to black men. I believe your ten racist requests made fun of all races other than "Brothers" didn't it? Something about "boys who want to be lovers"?
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Sunday 04 May
By loni
Black women shave their legs! they dont all wear weaves...they dont all have big booties...and the reason there are alot more black men with white women than black women with white men is because slight ignorance. it's not their fault...but if you mix around a little bit and just have more casual black friends it wont b so hard to understand them and have one
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Wednesday 07 May
By acidbrat
"... that fried kinky, nasty hair. White women are better. Period. Because WE are the only ones with different color eyes, eyes the color of the sky, green the color of earth, hazel the color of topaz."
Boy, I hope this was meant to be sarcastic! Otherwise, I'm gonna have to inform all my blue/green/hazel-eyed relatives that they aren't black! (And no, they're not wearing contact lenses.)
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Thursday 08 May
By White devil
Do the majority of black people in this country really view white people like Jeremiah White? I really want to know. I hope that is not the case.
I personally don't want to be hated for things that happened in history.... and things that I have not done myself.
If race relations are really that bad... and most black people think like this .... I think I give up, there is no hope.
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Thursday 15 May
By dhij
Obviously no one can speak for everyone but Black people are not as racist as professed. Everyone I know and have met, myself included, regards everyone as individuals and relates to them as such. But just as there are ignorant and bigoted people that hate all Black people, homosexual people, short people, there are some that hate all White people, heterosexual people, and tall people.
Thursday 08 May
By grizzly
This is just stupid. What's the point in writing this article? This could just as easily be applied to women with blonde hair, brown hair, skinny women, full-figured women, women of other races, women who go to a certain college, women who go to a certain bar and so on.
Why not just say men need to not say stupid things to ALL women. Why do you have the need to separate black women from all other women?
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