As the recent flare-ups in the presidential campaign have shown, America's still pretty messed up when it comes to race. Even though we're not naive enough to think such problems can be fixed by a blog post, we'd like to do our thang to bridge the divide. That's right, like Pepé Le Pew, we're lovers, not fighters. Ergo, we'd like to tell you boys who want to be lovers a few things you've been saying to the sisters that you shouldn't.
We can't tell you the right thing to say, but Jennifer Fields and Alexis Stodghill --- two African-American women from the office who date all colors of the rainbow -- are about to school the men of this world (white, black, Asian and Inuit) on the worst things you can say to a black woman.
This advice won't help you get a date with Beyoncé Knowles or Kelly Rowland, but at least you won't get a drink thrown in your face.
10. "I was raised by black people." (If your nanny or butler was black when you were growing up, you do not pass as an honorary black person.)
9. "Black women are so sexy." (You may think this is a compliment, but it's just another form of stereotyping or fetishizing African-American women.)
8. "Can I touch your hair?" (Don't ask anything about the hair, or whether you can touch it. Such an exchange will never end well.)
7. "I only date black women." (You think you're going to impress her because you're down, but saying that just makes it seem like black women are a "type.")
6. "You're the black Audrey Hepburn." (Don't tell a women she's the black version of a particular white woman. Men do not say to a white woman, "You're the white Condoleezza Rice.")
Read the Top 5 things you shouldn't say (after the jump).
5. "I don't see any difference between the races." (You may think you're Ghandi, but you're not.)
4. "It's not like you're the first black woman I've dated." (Yeah, that comes off as creepy fetishizing, too.)
3. "You look like En Vogue." (It's never a smart idea to compare one woman to a group of women who all look very different, no matter their color.)
2. "Black women are so much cooler with sex than white women." (If you think implying black women are looser than white women is gonna get you some, you're wrong.)
1. "I'm voting for Obama." (Millions of people are voting for Obama. It doesn't make you that cool.)
Are there other things that should never be said? Let us know.
Also check out Things That Can Doom an Interracial Relationship.
More Essential Tips for Things You Should Never Say
10 Things You Should Never Say to a Tall Woman
10 Things You Should Never Say to a Asian Woman
10 Things You Should Never Say to a Porn Star
10 Things You Should Never Say to Twins


























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Comments:
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Monday 23 June
By ohtheirony
yeah right! are you kidding me? i suppose that all the black ppl should thank the whites for taking us out of our country and making us slaves, oh and introducing drugs to the places where the black population was most concentrated.....yeah we have A LOT to be thankful for! BTW, I am black AND native american PLUS i have white descendants too.
Also, it native AMERICAN, idiot, unless you're a native of india (thus the name indian). the only reason we're referred to as indians is b/c some retard didn't know how to read a map and start calling a foreigner the first thing he could think of. so get it right
Wednesday 21 May
By Ralph0
They need to thank the decendants of the civil war heros, that is who they need to thank! What, that don't make no sense? Say thank you to someone who wasn't even in the war ? Kinda like making no sense to give money to people who was NEVER enslaved. But wait, if ya do get money, remember, Native Indians was here first. And that would mean money changing from white hands to black hands, and then, yeah u guessed it, to Native Indians ! Go ahead and get ya reparations, Native Indians need more money ! LOL
Reply
Saturday 21 June
By socialtalker
ralpho apparently you are not aware of the vast resources and grants/reparations given only to native americans. free four year college automactically, not to mention casino rights and thats just off the top of my head.
are you also aware that a number of indian tribes not only fought FOR the south to keep slavery, they worked very hard to KEEP blacks enslaved on their reservation long after the war.
Wednesday 21 May
By Ernie
They need to thank the decendants of the civil war heros, that is who they need to thank! What, that don't make no sense? Say thank you to someone who wasn't even in the war ? Kinda like making no sense to give money to people who was NEVER enslaved. But wait, if ya do get money, remember, Native Indians was here first. And that would mean money changing from white hands to black hands, and then, yeah u guessed it, to Native Indians ! Go ahead and get ya reparations, Native Indians need more money ! LOL
Reply
Thursday 22 May
By Mr White Caucasian.
If this list is true then black woman are racist.
Reply
Monday 23 June
By Joyfull_1
one list made by 2 black women doesn't count for all the black women. instead of taking this list into account for only black women, make it for ALL women, b/c it could be offensive to a woman of any race, really, if you make it that way.
everyone tends to have a little racist in them, but as a black woman, this list really wasn't very accurate. it's pretty stereotypical of what the "average black woman" would think of...not all of them tho.
Sunday 25 May
By John
Hot is hot.
Reply
Tuesday 27 May
By Ameena
This article was necessary. It obviously has a comedic feel to it, but there is certainly truth to it. What is interesting is how some people are reacting. I don't have a weeve nor green eyes, but I have dated a white man before. He was great and didn't need to read this article, but I have ran into guys who did. What's all the fuss about? If it helps you get closer to someone you want to date. For all the guys that are curious use this article as a pick up line(s). You can always say to a women of color that you read this article on Asylum and you are doing your own research. Happy dating...
Reply
Thursday 29 May
By jinky
I don't like extensions or 'weaves' on ANYBODY really, they look fake and are unnecessary, but as others have stated, at least on white gals it is the way their hair looks naturally for the most part, just longer and more so. The worst 'bond' is long 'CHER' hair on a dark black lady. That looks so obviously phony that you feel sorry for them, that they don't embrace culturally appropriate styles , and this long straight hair isn't right for their facial features, as it isn't for a bunch of the white girls either.
Reply
Thursday 29 May
By alanda
oh, dark, black ladies can not have long hair ? what else can dark, black ladies not have ?
Tuesday 29 July
By Greeklife1913
I happen to be a dark black girl from Grenada, W.I. and my hair reaches to the middle of my back I have a relaer with straightens it and its all mine or wait and all my other BLACK friend shave long hair too maybe you should get out more and leave the farm
Monday 02 June
By peachesandherb
This is pretty interesting. Women everywhere receive insulting comments when getting approached by guys. I am pretty surprised that people cannot understand that given the history of racial segregation and hatred that has defined most of our country's history, and still persists today although it is not legislated into law, that ya'll can't understand why white men would say stupid things to black women they are trying to pick up out of ignorance. That just seems like a natural fact and outcome of the particular climate of America. This does not negate the negative experiences of other women, nor is it a chick on black women's shoulders. These are nasty things people are saying to us particular to our race. How in the world is this our fault?
Reply
Friday 06 June
By VT
The spelling, its Gandhi, not Ghandi!!
Reply
Sunday 08 June
By Glenn
You have it all wrong, it is about the money
Reply
Tuesday 10 June
By Sliverbane
What's wrong with asking to touch your hair? People are honestly curious - as a black woman I've been asked that very question. I laugh and I say 'Sure'. They give me a little pat on the head or examine my pony-tail and I smile at them and say 'See - it's not that scary'. And in most cases they laugh with me.
Reply
Friday 13 June
By garry
As the saying goes, once you have had black, there is no going back, It is very true, once you get a little taste of a sweet black lady, you are hooked for life.
Reply
Saturday 14 June
By IRONBLUEEYES
Don't say anything more than hello to women of any color that even vaguely resemble these two.
Reply
Sunday 15 June
By Sakura
What about women of other races? Asian, African American, White, Hispanic. It's not just black girls that can be offended.
"Are you Chinese?" (Not every Asian you see is Chinese)
"Hola. Hablo Espanol" (Speaking the little Spanish you know to a Hispanic woman isn't cool.)
Or whatever
Everyone can be offended
Men too
Reply
Thursday 19 June
By Yasser
I must say that these are pretty dumb things to say to anyone.
Reply
Saturday 21 June
By FLLady
Too many women have attitudes these days. Look past the beauty & find the real substance, if there's any. REMEMBER these cranky "girls" are only going to be bigger biotches later. If you can't be comfortable talking to someone, then move on to someone who isn't all about their race. There are a lof of traits we each have, to focus on race alone is going backwards. Guys, treat women like ladies & women, get over yourselves.
Reply