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Ever since Justin Timberlake brought sexy back, we've been hard-pressed to define it. We thought we knew what it was before, but much like the Batman in "The Dark Knight," Justin Timberlake changed things, and now we're left trying to figure out this brave new world.

So in a search for understanding, we reported on two videos this week that redefined what we think of as sexy: a video of a drunk man having sex with an SUV and two gentlemen "consoling" each other behind a CNN reporter trying to explain the Lehman Brothers collapse.

Sexy is indeed a mysterious beast.

Watch the videos and check out our seductive arguments after the jump.



"Drunk Man Having Sex with a Car"

Strengths: It's real. This man is really, really having sex with a car. It's not radio comics trying to get attention, just one drunk making sweet love to a sweet machine.

Weaknesses: Low video quality. If you're going to post videos of a man having sex with a car on the Internet, either 1) Don't use a cell phone to film it or 2) get closer.

Special Abilities: Creativity. This guy got arrested for performing an indecent act with a car. In a way, he's a true artist.



"Videobombers"

Strengths: At Asylum, we understand that nothing is sexier than awkwardness and embarrassment. This prank is super awkward, monumentally embarrassing and therefore exceptionally sexy.

Weaknesses: It reeks of falseness. These dudes aren't even gay. On a completely separate note, we don't have any desire to see to two guys making out, not that there's anything wrong with that.

Special Abilities: Guess what? Videobombing, unlike regular bombing, is totally legal and worth mimicking. We have nothing against news correspondents, but we think these guys may have started a revolution.