Sinkhole Cocktails, Anyone?
Virgin Auction Now A Reality TV Series
It's AVN season, the time when porn stars dress up in their finest PVC attire and compete for awards in categories such "Best All-Girl 3-Way Sex Scene." And for those lucky enough to be attending the AVN awards on January 10th in Las Vegas, it's also the time when porn stars leap out of the DVD player and come to life to pose for pictures and sign your time-worn copy of "Jenna Loves Rocco." Luckily, adult entertainer and Wicked Girl Stormy Daniels (who is nominated for both "Best Supporting Actress" and "Crossover Star of the Year") was kind enough to give us some pointers on how to keep your foot out of your mouth when faced with your favorite porn stars. Read on to find out 10 things you should never say to a porn star.
10. You're too pretty to do porn. (So, you're saying you would prefer to watch ugly people f*ck?)
9. Your vagina must be really worn out. (Mine isn't nearly as bad as your mother's after pushing such a giant idiot like you out of it.)
8. I would never watch porn. I think it is degrading to women. (Then how did you know my name? And my measurements? And my astrological sign? And my birthdate?)
7. How do I get my girlfriend/wife to do ________? (Ask her, not me. By the way, talking to me in the first place is not helping your cause.)
Stormy Daniels
Stormy Daniels
Wicked
Stormy Daniels
Getty Images
Stormy Daniels
Getty Images
Stormy Daniels
Getty Images
Stormy Daniels
Wicked
Stormy Daniels
Getty Images
Stormy Daniels
Wicked
Stormy Daniels
Getty Images
Stormy Daniels
Wicked
Stormy Daniels
Getty Images
Find out more things you should never say to a porn star after the jump.
6. Wow! You're so much prettier/younger/thinner in your photos. (Obviously your mother didn't teach you anything and it is called Photoshop.)
5. I pleasured myself to you 10 times this week! (OK, I didn't need to know precisely how pathetic you are. And stop trying to shake my hand. I now unfortunately know exactly where it has been.)
4. I could do porn. (No, you couldn't. If you could, you already would be ... and no, I will NOT audition you!)
3. Are those yours? (Well, I paid for them.)
2. Do you think you are going to hell? (Discussing religion with a porn star will get you as far as discussing porn with your grandmother ... just don't try it.)
1. I wanna take you out on a "real" date. ( I did not realize all my other ones were imaginary.)
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Comments:
Add a comment
Sunday 18 January
By Phil
How about "How many gallons of cum do you think you have swallowed"? Would that be OK?
Reply
Friday 03 July
By sacks22
LMFAO!!!!!!
Tuesday 20 January
By Baby Jay
More than half these porn chicks escort on the side if you really want to fuck them.
Reply
Friday 01 April
By scavengergirl
Huh. I have no idea why you'd want to have sex with them after having watched so many take their turn 1st. Not to mention actaully PAYING to do it? Yuck.
Friday 23 January
By xjustreallybored
most likely the pornstars would like getting picked up, no matter what the guy says because...well because they're whores
Reply
Tuesday 29 March
By scave
Unlikely. They want your money, not your penis.
Friday 23 January
By DaveH.
By morphsNeutral
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Morphs" said....
Does this idiot realize that she just called all of her fans pathetic?
What's more pathetic, whacking off or being a whore? I hope she doesn't kid herself and think she's not
--------------------------------
Uh, hey Morphs, don't forget, you and gazillions of other "pathetic" losers just like you are the ones PAYING her to ACT like a whore and she's laughing all the way to the bank. Unless of course you and your comrades think all that moaning is (LOL) real??? yeah, right. At least she's having the last laugh, and you, well, you're still pathetic anyway you look at it...you didn't even get the humor in the blog. Went waaaay over your head. No pun intended. Now get back you your whacking off.
Reply
Tuesday 27 January
By cybearkat
speaking as someone who has actually done porn. (gay variety) we get ALOT of the same dumb-assed questions. (our awards are in chicago on memorial day weekend, The Grabbies) only alot of them are even more crass.if you can only imagine that.
Reply
Saturday 21 March
By erwoerewt
How about "how many std's have you caught?"
anyway i totally agree, what a condescending bitch- shes nothing more than a living cum ditch.
Pornstars are just glorified prostitutes. Even though many would disagree with that statement, its technically true, Prostitution:The act of offering one's self for hire to engage in sexual relations. yep she is a prostitute.
Reply
Tuesday 19 May
By mike
Im pretty shure she will be taunted about every single question she asked and answered herself here.
Hey porn lady Why do you think theres more then 3 people on this planet who even care to know your name?
STFU. we dont wana know.
Reply
Monday 06 July
By Daniel Lovejoy
I don't know why I would want to talk to a porn star, but if I were asking questions I would ask things like "How many venereal diseases have you had?" or "At what age did you discover you had no class?" These questions would apply to both male and female skanks.
Reply
Friday 10 July
By mohamed
i don`t think i like watching sex movies i hope they stop doing that on camera
but i can`t find the way to make them stop
Reply
Saturday 01 August
By jaguen123
You have reached new lows in grossness with such comments.
Reply
Thursday 06 August
By Matt
"Well I paid for them." HA!
Reply
Friday 28 August
By the authority
Your vagina must be really worn out! ha, thats an understatement! how about i can smell the trash you keep hidden in your deep throat? i'd be scared to talk to a porn star in person due to the new and undiscovered stds she'd be incubating into airborne virus's, i mean really, who marries porn stars? who dates porn stars? and what type of conversation could you get out of a porn star? why talk to them at all? i usually throw down a few bucks and watch them fight like wild pigeons going after a few pinches of snitchas rye.
Reply
Monday 31 August
By seancarter
this was an interesting topic I would say!!! I really dod have a good time checking out all the comments,
regardless of how we watch porn we still tend to judge them in a very mean way. but then I gues some times is just natural for society to shun such occupations its an in built instict thing
I do watch porn but certainly wouldnt wanna see my kid sister or family acting in it,wouldnt even wanna see my lil brother or son watch it.
but just as some one told me prostitution is indeed an old profession and very dynamic
during our generations it has evoveled into so many things,porno,strippers etc etc
time will tell
Reply
Tuesday 01 September
By keke
I don't understand why she gets offended when ppl ask her the same questions. Obviously they view as nothing more than a whore. if they keep asking the same thing then what does that tell you? As if she deserves respect. She may be getting paid but at what cost, a torn vagina not being taken seriously by no man again. Yeah I think im going to be the one laughing.
Reply
Friday 25 June
By MisterNameless
Ok, so, I'm rummaging through the 10 Things You Should Never Say articles, and I come across this one. I've got to say this plainly and simply. Ninety percent of you commentors? Pathetic. You bitch and complain at this when it's just one person giving her opinion. Honestly? She's probably right. As to the whore comments? It's a job. Some people do physical labor, some accounting, some are porn stars. Anyone who feels the need to complain and bitch about them, well... I'll say again: You're pathetic. On the other side, I find the 10 Things articles amusing and slightly informative. Honestly, most of them are just common sense, and what's most amusing is to find out people actually say/ask them.
Bang-
Mister Nameless
Reply
Thursday 24 March
By Jay
Well considering your going to look like a 60 year old hooker when you hit 30 and the closest you ever get to networking in your profession is catching spunk with your face at a circle-jerk.....your should REALLY start to find your pathtic fans interesting.
Reply