Have You Heard of a Nipple Extractor?

We'd never heard of the fetishy-looking gadget (pictured left) that's currently going for $4.73 on Amazon, but the name "nipple extractor" certainly summons up some heady imagery. Apparently some other pranksters had the same idea, because several of them left reviews like the following from "Shantell Powell."

"I grew up without nipples. I knew that one day, they would descend, and that would be the day when I could proudly call myself a woman. But I was growing worried. By the time I was 17, I still had no nipples. At 21, I was beginning to panic. When I turned 27, I finally found these nipple extractors, and they saved my self-esteem.

With two simple twists of the wrist, I flowered. Now I could proudly disrobe at the local topless beach, where before I'd been shamed.

I've just been debating whether or not I should attempt to locate superfluous nipples elsewhere on my body."

A little bit of research reveals that a nipple extractor is actually a plumbing tool "inserted internally to loosen pipe." Read more humorous explanations from Amazon after the jump. (Via Random Good Stuff)

From "Billy Baloney Genius":

"I have been having issues with my nipples for years so I figured I would give this product a try. I found that it worked great for a couple of weeks and then it became extremely difficult to continue use. The rash and irratation became too much to tolerate. It is just easier to buy a set of jumper cables and a battery charger. Trust that works much better!"

From "s. Mathew":

"I bought one for my girlfriend as a Christmas present but the instructions that came with it made no sense."