
Getting blackout drunk is generally not a good idea, but it turns out that your blotto stumble home can make you rich (even if you have to lose a leg in the process).
Dustin Dibble, 25, was evidently so drunk one night in 2006 that he fell onto the tracks of an oncoming subway train in Manhattan. Dibble's blood alcohol level was .18 at the time (which is more than double the legal limit for drivers) and he has no memory of the train taking off his right leg below the calf. Now, however, Dibble has won a lawsuit against the MTA, claiming that the subway driver should have seen him on the tracks and stopped before hitting him. It was decided that Dibble bore only 35 percent of the blame for his amputation, and a jury awarded Dibble $2.3 million in compensation for the incident.
Having stumbled around drunkenly a few times ourselves, we wonder whether we could have leveraged our bad choices into making ourselves rich. After all, with a million dollars, we could probably replace our leg with a high-tech prosthetic that's even better than the original.
Our Top Ten Favorite Drunks
- Our Top Ten Favorite Drunks
10. Winston Churchill
Prime Minister, author, Nobel Prize winner -- Sir Winston accomplished more on a typical hungover Sunday than most of us do during our entire lives. We can barely be bothered to go out for brunch most weekends.
Photo From AP - Our Top Ten Favorite Drunks
9. Slash
Though he's no longer a raging alkie, have you ever seen the artist formerly known as Saul Hudson not pictured with a bottle filled with something or other? And, of course, there was his memorable obscenity-laden acceptance speech at the1990 American Music Awards. Well, memorable to us anyway. We doubt Slash remembers much of anything that happened during the early '90s.
Photo From AP - Our Top Ten Favorite Drunks
8. Nick Nolte
Even before his infamous mugshot, Nolte perpetually looked like he'd just come off a six-week bender. For a lesson in the perils of heavy drinking check out Nolte's performance opposite Julia Roberts in "I Love Trouble," a film that could only have been made while heavily under the influence.
Photo From AP - Our Top Ten Favorite Drunks
7. Dorothy Parker
Parker famously said, "Men seldom make passes at girls who wear glasses." But they do go for gals who can fill glasses and then drink them under the Algonquin Round Table, and Ms. Parker could down a vodka gimlet faster than you can say "the dry wit of Robert Benchley."
Photo From AP - Our Top Ten Favorite Drunks
6. Janis Joplin
So associated with hard drinking is Miss Janis that it's hard to listen to her sing without feeling like your liver's filling to the brim with Southern Comfort. (The phrase "booze-soaked vocals" was practically invented for her.) Janis still makes Amy Winehouse sound like Miley Cyrus.
Photo From AP - Our Top Ten Favorite Drunks
5. Andy Capp
Everyone's favorite comic-strip rummy has been tossing back pints and threatening his long-suffering wife Flo with violence since 1957. Seriously, isn't it time that Social Services took a long, hard look at that marriage? - Our Top Ten Favorite Drunks
4. Ernest Hemingway
The prototypical hard-drinking author, Papa Hemingway has given generations of mediocre writers an excuse to wail into their beers about their unpublished masterpieces. Still, as fine an author as he was, we figure his fondness for creepy, multi-toed cats must have had something to do with large quantities of alcohol.
Photo From AP - Our Top Ten Favorite Drunks
3. Betty Ford
Although Gerald Ford was renowned for falling over all the time, it turns out Betty was the one with a drinking problem! While we would never make light of Mrs. Ford's struggles (excluding the preceding joke), it should be noted that having a rehab center named after you definitely earns you a place in the pantheon of hard drinkers. Plus, she's currently the third-longest-living former First Lady. Top that, Mamie Eisenhower!
Photo From AP - Our Top Ten Favorite Drunks
2. Bender from 'Futurama'
Bender's name doesn't just refer to his function as a robot who bends things: Liquor is his life's blood. Now if only he'd get toasted and punch out that wussy robot from "Lost In Space." - Our Top Ten Favorite Drunks
1. Keith Richards/Captain Jack Sparrow
The most inspiring drunk of our time. Richards is such a notorious and charismatic drunk that Johnny Depp based Jack Sparrow on him and then coerced Richards into playing his drunken, pirate father in the third film. As rum-soaked as Capt. Jack is, he pales in comparison to Richards himself, who got so hammered he took a tumble out of a coconut tree.
Photo From AP
Most Dangerous Drinks
Ethanol/Grain Alcohol It is illegal to sell this 190-proof "drink" in California, Florida, Hawaii, Illinois, Maine, Massachusetts, Michigan, Minnesota, Nevada, New York, Ohio, Pennsylvania, Virginia, and Washington. Obviously, the liver has lobbyists in those states.
Jeff Gentner, AP
Moonshine Prohibition caused people to take all sorts of odd steps to get their buzz on. For those who took the Bo and Luke route, a shoddy brew included methanol (a.k.a. wood alcohol) that acts in a few hours and can cause blindness. Perhaps that allowed them to not realize they were making out with cousin Daisy.
Hector Mata, AFP / Getty Images
Hjemmebrent Norway's Moonshine goes a bit further, being distilled to 96% alcohol. In Tara Grescoe's book "The Devil's Picnic," drinking hjemmebrent is described this way: "You were sober then you were drunk. It was grim, goal-oriented, and a little sad. And the hangover was like no other." Scary. We can't imagine anything worse than a PBR hangover.
vgb.no
Blood Religious groups and tribes, including the Suri of Ethiopia, have been drinking blood for centuries. For some it's a ritual, for others it's just a great way to risk contracting Hepatitis B and C.
Corbis
Coca Cola Coca-Cola launched the disastrous "New Coke" in 1985, but in truth, the stuff we'd been consuming for decades was new. The true original version had cocaine in it. If Coca Cola still had cocaine in it, the world would be a sleepless wasteland of rambling teeth grinders.
AP
Black Drink Made from roasted leaves of the Yaupon Holly, Native Americans males consumed the Black Drink in a ritualistic manner, substituting it for coffee or tea. They purged themselves after imbibing for hours at a time, leading to the berry's appealing Latin name, "Ilex vomitoria."
wikipedia.com
Jolt Cola Jolt Cola's slogan is "all the sugar and twice the caffeine." But if you consider that a few of the symptoms of caffeine overdose include restlessness, nervousness, insomnia, increased urination, gastrointestinal distress, muscle twitching, irritability, and irregular heart beat, a cold Jolt doesn't sound so good.
AP
Bombes Enterprising bar owners in Greece originally came up with Bombes -- a mixture of alcohol and cheap, dangerous industrial spirits. These drinks are so lethal that the government had to step in, because the loss of bar patrons due to death wasn't enough to keep them from being served.
Fox Photos / Getty Images
Bud Extra A couple of years back, someone at Budweiser came up with a plan to keep beer drinkers from passing out. They called it "B to the E," and injected it with ginseng and high levels caffeine. In June 2008, Anheuser-Busch pulled the product in response to public criticism, which was completely warranted.
AP
Kumis Though not technically a danger to your physical health, there's something psychologically troubling about sipping Kumis, a booze made from fermented mare's milk. Russians have been drinking from the horse's teat for centuries, but we'll pass.
wikipedia.com



























Comments:
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Friday 20 February
By vocedivina
Only in America do we reward people for being drunk and stupid. If you wonder why insurance is so expensive and lawyers so abundant, look no further...
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Friday 20 February
By Pat
Amen to that!!! Unbelievable, how did the train driver become responsible for the drunken fool!!! Only in the American Court system!
Friday 20 February
By jbjg24m
AREN'T ANY SUBWAYS HERE WHERE I LIVE , BUT THERE ARE RAILROADS NOT TOO FAR FROM MY HOUSE !! I WONDER !!
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Friday 20 February
By ross
No thanks I would not trade a limb for $ knowingly
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Friday 20 February
By Peggy
I have heard it all!!!!!!!!!! What did the railroad have to do with someone being drunk and falling? This is why our fares keep going up, or a least one of the reason's. ***My grandson was stabbed at Mc Donalds when he was 16 and almost died.*** The boy who stabbed him was working and came from behind the counter and stabbed him, because of exchanged words. He never got a dime*** Why?? Because they thought my grandson went in there to start trouble. My grandson had no weapons, this kid did, he carried a knife to work. To boot, McDonalds never paid for the hospital bills, which came to 70,000. What is wrong with our system??? I guess it is who you know!!!!! I really had to share that, because of what I read...Check it out. He is now 24, and have many scars, we all must live with, including his fears. Who really cares????
Reply
Friday 20 February
By Bob
Well Peggy, that is why more people are taking matters into their own hands.
Friday 20 February
By Jennifer
I'm sorry but how is it McDonald's fault that your grandson went into one of their establishments and started a fight? Perhaps if you or your child (the grandson's parent) had taught him how to act and how to treat others there would not have been an exchange of words in the first place. Not that anyone deserves to be stabbed over a verbal argument but why not go after the kid who stabbed him and leave McDonald's out of it. You are what is wrong with America, people like you who make rules to protect idiots. It's not "who you know", but whether or not you have a jury intelligent enough to tell you that you forgot your common f***ing sense when you went and got yourself hurt. I guess this guy was just lucky enough to have jury of people who were as stupid as he is.
Friday 20 February
By Niki
In your defense I do think your son should have gotten something. A verbal fight is one thing, but clearly the employee was the one who became physically violent. I dont know what your son said, but I have seen many cases where I questioned other peoples behavior. "The other person could have a gun." is many things I think about, and people who start it, never consider that. I think that if there was some fear out there, a lot more people would be nicer. However, why on earth would a McDonalds employee be armed like that? Which is why your son felt safe, atleast inside the restaurant. And more importantly, what on earth could have been said that provoked that?!? 10% blame goes to your son, 75% goes to the employee, 15% goes to McDonalds, mostly for having an unsafe environment. Sucks for mcDonalds, but they are responsible for their employees behavior while on the clock and in uniform.
This whole "unsafe environment" would be what the subway is guilty for. 10% the subways fault, 5% the drivers, because unlike the mcdonalds employee, he was doing his job. I doubt he could see him in time to stop even if he could. And how many passengers would have been injured even if he could? Those things dont have seatbelts, and I doubt that many people hold on. However 30% goes to the bar or restaurant where he got plastered. They are allowed to cut off their customers for a reason. They are liable if something happens, they could even loose their liquor license! 55% is the fault of the drunk. At some point he is responsible for his own actions. No one forced him to drink
Friday 20 February
By xshotite
I have to say it really depends on the situation. Also courts usually put partial responsibility for situations like this. The ridiculous thing in the train case is that it is only 35% his fault, and the Macdonald's one that they claim all of it was your grandsons fault.
Anyway I guess it depends a lot on the situation. For those that say that it is because of the argument I have to ask how it was started. I worked at Subway for a few years and have ran into some weird situations with customers. I had one get really mad, swear at me, and then leave the store. The reason was because I put to much mustard on his sandwich, it came out of the bottle much faster than I expected, and I was willing to make him a new sandwich but he didn't give me the chance to offer him that. We also had to get a restraining order against a guy because when my manager handed him his debit card it slid out of her hand and he claimed that she had thrown it at him. The idea of throwing a credit card at someone is ridiculous especially since it didn't even reach him when he was standing two feet away, it kind of skidded across the counter half way.
Crazy things happen and people take them way out of proportion.
Monday 23 February
By Jennifer
I have a feeling there is more to this story than what you are telling. The jury found that your grandson walked in there with the intent of causing trouble, that to me says that there must have been some kind of evidence to prove that your grandson either a. has a history of that kind of behavior or b. had a previous altercation with this boy. Like I said, no one deserves to be stabbed over a verbal altercation, but, the reason this boy armed himself in the first place may have been because he had been previously threatened by your grandson and felt that he had to defend himself. On top of that, McDonald's has no way of knowing when they hire someone whether that person is going to end up being violent, other than criminal background checks, which, if this was a minor boy, those files would have been sealed. To say that McDonald's is responsible for the unpredictable behavior of someone registered to their establishment is like saying that the school should be liable for those Columbine kids. We people as a whole need to learn to grow up and take responsibility for our own actions and stop trying to blame everyone else for our own stupidity. And like I said, go after the kid who stabbed your grandson because his behavior is his fault and stop listening to your money grubbing lawyer who is telling you to go after McD's simply because you can squeeze more out of them.
Friday 20 February
By Misty5
This is why our country is how it is!! We let idiots win lawsuits, that were caused by their own stupidity!! Have you ever ridden on one of the subway trains? They don't always go slow, infact at times they move pretty quickly and it is often pretty dark. So the engineer of the train wouldn't of had time enough to stop the train before hitting the guy on the tracks. The idiot is lucky he didn't land on the third rail or he would have been DEAD!! This judge is also an idiot for rewarding him all this money and should lose his job for it!! It just rediculous how we reward people for doing stupid and idiotic things but when there is actually a legitimate case and that person should be rewarded something they get zilch or nothing!!!
Reply
Friday 20 February
By Jason
Nicely said even though I think zilch and nothing are the same thing...anyways. Our country is doomed to fail, I am convinced. You can not use improper form to take a piss now without getting sued of fired.
Friday 20 February
By MO
This is highway robbery, OOPS! I mean subway robbery. How can lawyers and judges get away with this? Drunk out of his mind falls in front of a subway train and gets rewarded with 2.3 million dollars. The justice system stinks.
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Friday 20 February
By Ralph
1st Timothy 6:10! "For the LOVE OF MONEY is a root of all sorts of injurious things...."
Friday 20 February
By K'Raal
Dean Wormer (Animal House): "Fat, drunk, and stupid is no way to go through life, son."
The subway should have sued HIM for getting his blood all over their train, causing it to be taken offline for cleaning, which was PROBABLY not an enjoyable job for the subway's maintenence workers. What about the subway train's operator? There's not much he / she could have done to stop the train in that kind of situation. First, the trains going along smoothly. The... oops, drunk idiot on the tracks! Thud!!
Not only did the subway lose money because that doof was too drunk to think (an obviously self-inflicted impairment), but also for repairs, delays, and overtime for the workers.
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Friday 20 February
By Peggy
****I would like to know the name of his ***attorney.*** I think we should all use him, in times of trouble. The man knows some big people in the system, to get this kind of settlement. ****You got it right, subway robbery****
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Friday 20 February
By shhad
YOU ARE NOT SERIOUS.....the judge, lawyers and anyone else needs to be locked up for allowing this. So, are they sayin that the next vehicular homicide by a person with a blood alcohol above the legal limit, is only 35% responsible? In our town, a drunk ran into the path of a newspaper truck and that driver was not responsible. Oh, yes it was at night and dark. The injured was also, homeless does that matter? Was this individual even charged with Public Intoxication? We, wonder why this great country is the way it is.................
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Friday 20 February
By The Dradle
what chaps my ass most is that his 2.3 million dollar mishap held up the lines and held of god knows how many commuters' trips home. Is it possible to sue this one-legged bandit for negligence causing unnecessary life stress? if only he fell face first...
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Friday 20 February
By casual49
i have been trying to enlist a friend or family member into my plan. the plan is: first we get a hammer (has to be a brand name with deep pockets)then i hit them in the head with it. we then sue the hammer manufactorer because there is no warning label on the handle that reads: WARNING!!! HITTING PEOPLE IN THE HEAD MAY RESULT IN SERIOUS INJURY OR DEATH!!!
so far, i've had no luck in my recruitment efforts
Reply
Friday 20 February
By Bob
See if Dustin is interested!!!!!