Having 7,000 of anything seems great, unless you're the Dow Jones Industrial Average, which plunged to 7114.78, its lowest level since May 7, 1997.

We've collectively got about $4 still stuffed in our mattresses, just waiting to invest, so let us know if you have any great ideas in the comments.

In the meantime, we'll be polishing our barrel and thinking about other things we'd like to bring back from the Great Depression.