Aussie brand ASM Liquor has ensured that the nation of Australia will soon be invaded by a group of angry drunk men sporting kilts and bagpipes by claiming its Naked Scot won't make you want to kill yourself in the morning. They say Naked Scot is a "hangover-free" whisky because it's free of pesticides, herbicides and fungicides -- a claim which implies that all other whiskies contain those forbidden fruits.

A miffed Scotch Whisky Association had this to say: "The claim is misleading because the science of distillation means there is no question of 'residual herbicides, pesticides and fungicides' being in any bottle of Scotch whisky."

'Cides are what's giving us that clinically depressed day after? Here we always thought dehydration caused hangovers. Regardless, they are more than welcome to send a case our way for testing -- just as a public service, of course.