We think it's safe to say that people won't exactly be lining up to challenge Pedro Olivia's newly achieved world record. The Brazilian kayak daredevil (lunatic?) fell 127 feet in a kayak after paddling over the edge of a waterfall in the Rio Sacre. You can just barely see his canoe in the picture to the left as he smashes the record for life-threatening boat-based idiocy.

Olivia's free fall took all of 2.9 seconds and surpassed the previous high mark for "descent in a kayak" by 19 feet. (Yes, apparently that is a real record.)

Having carefully scouted a boulder-free target pool, the 26-year-old emerged unscathed from his insane death fall, aided by unusual river currents which produced "the softest water landing in the world," according to his team.

Actually, you know what the softest water landing in the world is? It's sliding into a nice hot bath, secure in the knowledge that, unless something goes terribly and unexpectedly wrong in your life, you will never ever go over the edge of 127-foot-tall Brazilian waterfall with only a tiny wooden boat for protection.