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Last night the defending World Champion Phillies took the field against the Atlanta Braves to begin the 2009 baseball season. For die-hard baseball fans, it meant the start of spring and the return of the sacred American pastime. But for many baseball haters, it marked the start of seven months of three- to four-hour exhibitions of tediousness, choking nightly SportsCenter broadcasts and intensifying football withdrawal.

So where do you come down? Are you looking forward to the next seven months of hardball? Also, to mark Opening Day, we've got videos from some of the most pathetic first pitches, after the jump.

Check out some other sports-related stories on our radar below:
Tom Izzo's fight for respect is genuine. (Fanhouse)
The Broncos get Orton and his neckbeard. (Kissing Suzy Kolber)
Torres and Mizugaki get big bonuses for "Fight of the Year." (Cage Potato)
Derek Lowe looks like Steven Seagal. (Uncoached)

Assistant dean of the Nevada medical school:


Cincinnati mayor:


Mariah Carey:


Real Men of Genius Pitch:


Blind Hope for Vision founder throws perfect strike (this should make the previous first pitchers feel even worse):