The tragic killing of "good guy" Steve McNair by his jealous 20-year-old mistress has highlighted what most of us have always suspected: Just about every professional athlete cheats on his wife. In fact, a poll by CNN revealed that between 80 and 90 percent of married pro jocks aren't faithful.
Although that sounds about right, we are bit baffled as to how CNN conducted a survey on such a sensitive topic, and when we tried to find similar scientifically backed numbers for other professions, they -- not surprisingly -- didn't exist.
So to determine what other occupations are most likely to be made up of adulterers, we considered a combination of factors, such as opportunity and the personality type the job attracts. And before you start yelling about how faithful you or your husband is, we are well aware that there are plenty of folks in these professions who don't stray. (Or so they say.)
Obviously it is far from a typical job, but we may as well get it out of the way. If 80 to 90 percent of athletes are unfaithful to their wives, only legendary ballplayer and unconventional mathematician Yogi Berra could properly calculate the percentage of rock stars who cheat.
Opportunity is to infidelity as location is to real estate. And there is no job which engenders more virtually risk-free cheating opportunities than that of a sales representative who travels. Even more so if he's working with a loosely audited expense account -- which gives any potential hotel bar Casanova an infidelity slush fund that his wife will never see.
Not only is power the ultimate aphrodisiac, but the same charisma and self-centeredness that makes for a good politician would also make it a lot easier to step out on the wife. The frightening part is that our leaders have this tendency to cheat even though they work in just about the only profession in which infidelity can result in job loss.
An all-powerful alpha male who directs younger, often single females around in a highly charged, informal environment that runs late into the night? Now that's a recipe for infidelity.
Any man in uniform
Chicks dig a man in uniform, and men in uniform -- whether they be cops or the UPS guy -- tend to have jobs that allow them to interact with lots of different, completely random, tempting women. Hell, even the innocuous-sounding milk man was known for getting frisky with housewives back in the day. For whatever reason, this doesn't seem to apply to postal-service workers.
Education is such a female-dominated profession that lonely lady teachers are often forced to turn to their underage charges when in need of loving. So it stands to reason that any male of legal age with access to the teacher's lounge would have much more opportunity to end up with strange hands down his pants than the guy who works at the plant would.
They have the uniform, they have the opportunity, and pilots also have a dedicated, largely female staff who actually call him "captain." Granted there were even more mile-high high jinks going on a few decades ago -- before they stopped hiring flight attendants just on looks, and started considering fun-killing competence.
Think we missed an occupation or engaged in professional slander? Let us know in the comments.