Like your 401(k), "Land of the Lost" and Plaxico Burress's career, the summer of 2009 is a fast-fading memory. This time of year has always been painful -- it used to usher in the return of teachers, homework and back-to-school shopping horrors. Now, it marks the start of the long, sobering run to the holidays. You can live in denial, or you can suck it up and deal with it.

Yeah, we'll take denial too, that's why we've got five ways you can stretch summer a little longer (and not one of them involves a spray tan).

1. Be the beach

It could be a long time before the sweet, crisp scent of the ocean dances across your nostrils again. But now you can take the smell of summer with you well into football season. Demeter -- the fragrance company that gave us Wet Garden, Gin & Tonic and Play-Doh -- put the beach in a bottle with their Kahala Hawaiian Surf unisex cologne: a fresh, clean and sufficiently masculine scent that suggests sunscreen, sea spray and that hula dancer who was giving you the eye. (She was totally in to you.) For something a little more mid-Atlantic, check out Chesapeake Bay Spyce cologne, a scent more bayberry than coconut (and thankfully free of Old Bay).

And if you want to bring the ocean home, there are plenty of companies offering sprays, candles and home fragrances inspired by the sea. Restoration Hardware features an entire Shore cleaning collection, allowing you to keep the smell of summer alive, if only in your pots and pans.

2. Play in your sandbox

No matter what's raging outside, it's always summer indoors. And man's enduring need to harness and commodify nature's beauty has given us plenty of man-made beach options. Sadly the world's largest -- Japan's Seagaia Ocean Dome which boasted white marble sand, a wave machine, a fire-spewing volcano and constant 85-degree temps -- closed two years ago, but now even land-locked states like Iowa, Kansas, Ohio and Wisconsin keep the summer torch lit with their share of indoor water parks. (Indoorwaterparks.net has a thorough state-by-state rundown.)

But if it's the more adult combination of sand, booze and revelry you'll miss, some bars are staging their own beach parties. Night spots from Manhattan to Phoenix to the tiny English town of Birkenhead are trucking in the sand and encouraging patrons to leave their pants at home. But for a truly endless summer, we recommend diving into the bamboo, rum and Polynesian wonders of the 584 tiki bars and lounges listed at Critki. See how many you can hit before the spring thaw.

3. Buy your own sun

Whether or not you toast yourself to a golden brown each summer, there's no denying that the general absence of sunlight that comes with shorter days is an endless bummer. Mental health professionals call it Seasonal Affective Disorder. Instead of saying goodbye to the sun until next year, buy your own. Companies like Verilux and BlueMax specialize in lamps, light boxes and "dawn simulators" that provide full-spectrum or natural "white" sunlight. They won't get you tan -- light therapy devices cap their UV rays -- but they claim they can beat the end-of-summer blues. Maybe it's New Age bunk, but you don't want to sit around in the dark, do you?

4. Swimsuits never go out of style

Some scientists (OK, just us) suggest that for men, the post-summer funk has less to do with diminishing sunlight and everything to do with the disappearance of revealing clothing. Fear not -- some bold visionaries are toiling to prove that the bikini is a suit for all seasons. It's always spring break in Texas, where bikini contests abound. One of the state's longest running can be found every Monday night at the Big Apple Café in Fort Worth. The state even spawned a chain of sports bars dedicated to the heralded two-piece. But if you want a little more action, bikini bull riding seems to have supplanted foxy boxing and Jell-O wrestling as the boozy bikini battle of choice. Contests can be found everywhere from Crab Island, Fla., to Quakertown, Penn., to Kamloops, British Columbia, assuring that one of summer's more glorious offerings shines on. (And it'll probably do more for your mood than that light box thing we just told you about.)

5. It's still summer somewhere

It might not be summer where you are, but there are plenty of places where the sun is still shining and the surf is still churning. As you start layering on the clothes, South Carolina will boast summery temps through September, Alabama's Gulf Coast will stay in the 80s into October and south Florida will continue to hit the 80s well into November. If you really want to make a run for it, Hulopoe Beach on the island of Lana'i in Hawaii and Australia's Bondi Beach are particularly breathtaking, though it might be hard to swing a weekend trip halfway around the world.

The answer: Vegas (then again, that's our answer to everything). Pool-party season rages into October (though the Bellagio, Mandalay Bay, Caesar's Palace and others keep their pools open all year long and heated to about 80 degrees), and ideal golf weather stretches into November. (The truly desperate will be able to play all year long.) But with first-class spas, steamy clubs and more hot tubs per capita than anywhere else on earth, you can keep summer alive without stepping outside.

From the Web:
Summer Reading You Missed (AskMen)
Get Ready for Autumn -- Girls Named Autumn That Is! Zing! (Maxim)