Sep 18th 2009 By Ian Fortey

Man Caught Impersonating Governor Thanks to Poor Grammar

A West Virginia man attempting to steal personal information from people applying for fake jobs he had posted finally got caught when his poor grammar skills outed him.

Matthew Don Reed had been pretending he worked for the Division of Natural Resources in order to get people to send birth certificates and other info, along with job applications. He'd hired a man in Chicago to send out letters to people interested in those jobs, but his Chicago friend, upon seeing letters supposedly written by Governor Joe Manchin, was a little suspicious.

Letters lacking the official governor's seal are one thing, but when the governor uses words like "thangs" you know something's up. Part of the letter read "If you got ? please ask Matt," which is awesome if the governor is a teenage girl talking to a friend online, but somewhat hard to swallow in an official letter.

Reed is now held on a $10,000 bond under charges of impersonating a public official, impersonating a state Division of Natural Resources officer and forgery of a public document. So if you plan on committing some kind of massive fraud in the near future, you may want to consider taking a refresher course in English before you get too involved.

From the Web:

What's Wrong With This Sign? (Burbia)

Spell My Finger -- The Solitaire of Scrabble (Adult Swim)

Tags: dumb criminals - DumbCriminals - grammar - matthew don reed - MatthewDonReed - misspelling

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Sunday 20 September

By babs

Neutral

I think heavytoka is doing some heavey toking LOL

Sunday 20 September

By BABS

Neutral

OOPS I MEANT TO SAY HEAVY

Sunday 20 September

By downema1160

Neutral

Just another example of the dumbing-down of America. Schools all across our land are dropping handwriting lessons, replacing hardbacked books with Kindles, teaching revisionist history, permitting kids to choose what qualifies as "literature". One kid picked "Captain Underpants". A cute comic-book, but NOT great literature!!. What would happen if we first taught our kids critical thinking skills and then had them read "1984", "The Good Earth" or "Farenheit 451"? Do you think, just MAYBE, they'd put 2 and 2 together and draw the parallels? Folks complain about the public schools, but citizens choose who runs the show, and that includes the school boards. WAKE UP AMERICA! How long before education becomes another elitist right? Yes, we have a computer and yes, my kids read for FUN, but they ALSO know how to compose a paragraph, use a dictionary and thesaurus, listen with a discerning ear, and actually count their change at the store! Parents, it is your responsibility to make sure your children are learning what they need to be responsible, law-abiding, critically-thinking adults. If we don't, well, there goes the neighborhood........

Sunday 20 September

By Bagman520

Neutral

All the mistakes made by the posters here today are mistakes I see on blogs like this one every day. When I reply with a correction, not only does the original poster object to being corrected but several other posters will chime in telling me to "get a life" that "grammar isn't important" that "this is just the internet" and many other bits of "advice" that mean shut up and go away.

And by coincidence, just yesterday I read a post on another blog that was so shot full of mistakes in spelling, grammar, and punctuation, that I just had to reply. It also appeared that the writer failed to proof-read the post. Yes, I just had to reply. I won't re-post the whole thing here, but I will send the original post and my reply to whomever asks for it.

I can't post my email address here, but my AOL/IM name is Bagman520. You can get my email there.

I will tell you that the writer claims to have graduated 2nd in her high school class, claims to have graduated from a "respected private university" which goes unnamed in the post, and claims to have graduated with a 3.95 GPA. I will leave it to you to judge whether the writer should be believed. The actual point of the post is that even with "credentials" of a college degree and 3.95 GPA, all that is available are low-paying jobs and nothing better in the foreseeable future. It is as though the writer believes that simply graduating college with a 3.95 GPA should be enough on its own to guarantee success after college.

Here is the sentence that states that point:

"I have a four year degree graduated from a respected private university and graduated with a GPA of 3.95 and am still working a low wage job in which treat me terribly."

That is an exact copy of that sentence. The word "they" is missing at the end, and there isn't a comma to be found. How does someone who writes this poorly graduate from high school let alone college? And how can someone who writes like this claim to have been able to earn a 3.95 GPA?

The education system in this country is broken. Kids are just bumped through the grades and come out more ignorant than they were when they went in, and nobody seems to care. I have mentioned this to teachers. One reply I got was: "We teach the material. We can't help it if the kids don't learn it." Can you believe that??

I would like to know what you all think of this.

Bernie520
Seattle, WA

Sunday 20 September

By Bagman520

Neutral

All the mistakes made by the posters here today are mistakes I see on blogs like this one every day. When I reply with a correction, not only does the original poster object to being corrected but several other posters will chime in telling me to "get a life" that "grammar isn't important" that "this is just the internet" and many other bits of "advice" that mean shut up and go away.

And by coincidence, just yesterday I read a post on another blog that was so shot full of mistakes in spelling, grammar, and punctuation, that I just had to reply. It also appeared that the writer failed to proof-read the post. Yes, I just had to reply. I won't re-post the whole thing here, but I will send the original post and my reply to whomever asks for it.

I can't post my email address here, but my AOL/IM name is Bagman520. You can get my email address from my profile information there.

I will tell you that the writer claims to have graduated 2nd in her high school class, claims to have graduated from a "respected private university" which goes unnamed in the post, and claims to have graduated with a 3.95 GPA. I will leave it to you to judge whether the writer should be believed. The actual point of the post is that even with "credentials" of a college degree and 3.95 GPA, all that is available are low-paying jobs and nothing better in the foreseeable future. It is as though the writer believes that simply graduating college with a 3.95 GPA should be enough on its own to guarantee success after college.

Here is the sentence that states that point:

"I have a four year degree graduated from a respected private university and graduated with a GPA of 3.95 and am still working a low wage job in which treat me terribly."

That is an exact copy of that sentence. The word "they" is missing at the end, and there isn't a comma to be found. How does someone who writes this poorly graduate from high school let alone college? And how can someone who writes like this claim to have been able to earn a 3.95 GPA?

The education system in this country is broken. Kids are just bumped through the grades and come out more ignorant than they were when they went in, and nobody seems to care. I have mentioned this to teachers. One reply I got was: "We teach the material. We can't help it if the kids don't learn it." Can you believe that??

I would like to know what you all think of this.

Bernie520
Seattle, WA