Facebook has jumped the shark. There, we said it. It was amusing for about a month. Somewhere around this point, it all started to go downhill. As the Washington Post reports, more and more of the kids these days are deciding to have nothing to do with it -- and an increasing number of people and celebrities who've had their many faults (or, ahem -- assets) laid bare on social networks for the Huffington Post to gobble up, are deleting their Facebook and Twitter accounts altogether.But we think that's just a waste -- if you're going to give it up, why not raise some hell on your way out the door?
So set your status to fun, it's time to screw with all your "friends" one last time.
First, there are a couple of rules: Only mess with people you know can take a joke or people you don't care about losing touch with after you embarrass them in front of all the other people they don't really know except through Facebook.
Here are our top suggestions for going rogue on the 'book:
1. Comment on your unmarried friend's wall: "I can't believe you're finally going to propose to your girlfriend this weekend! Let me know how it goes. "
2. Just start copying and pasting other people's status updates. Over and over.
3. Comment under a picture of someone's newborn kid: "I hope he gets to meet his real dad some day."
4. Fake charities that sound like real ones are gold. Start fan pages and ask for donations for the March of Mimes or Easter Seals (the one that actually supports recently crucified and resurrected harbor seals).
5. Respond to every single status update with "that's what she said." Every. Single. Update. Of course this isn't actually funny, but the responses back at you will be outstanding.
6. Set your "in a relationship with" field on your profile to rotate through all of your friends' mothers.
7. Begin a relentless "poking" campaign. Totally relentless.
8. Post links for every single Asylum post on your wall and encourage all your friends to do the same -- so annoying, and such a waste of good wall space ...
From the Web:
15 Biggest Internet Jackasses of All Time. (COED)
The 15 Most Egregious Photoshop Jobs. (Cracked)
Comments:
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Tuesday 20 October
By Heavytoka
I think I can do some of these, I mean who cares if my close frieds and family hate me lol This will be fun!
Reply
Tuesday 20 October
By Tom
Who exactly is Asylum writing for? This is stupid and even worse, not funny. Who cares if "kids are deciding to have nothing to do with Facebook"? They're KIDS. They're stupid and disenfranchised by nature. Also, I do not think that "jumped the shark" means what you think it means. In order for something to "jump the shark" a specific event needs to transpire. (Look up the definition and see for yourself.) Being bored of Facebook does not constitute "jumping the shark". I can't believe I even wasted this much time typing this. You suck. So does this site.
Tuesday 20 October
By DuderMan
Tom your an artard. First off, this is funny. People should care about what kids are doing, because eventually, if they can avoid the onslaught of artards like yourself, they become teens - who have after-school jobs and trendsetting fashions. To wrap up my thesis, I'd like to point out, Booyah. Now go jump in a helium balloon.
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Tuesday 20 October
By lu
who cares if u don't like it stay out
Thursday 22 October
By Uta
Will really try this out
Reply
Thursday 22 October
By Nong
The asylum article says "As the Washington Post reports, more and more
of the kids these days are deciding to have nothing to do with it."
This is a very poor interpretation of the Washington Post article that
they link to.
Here's what that article says:
"[People in their 20s or early 30s who don't use social networks]
qualify as exotic life forms. The vast majority of their peers in the
millennial generation are social networking pros: About 85 percent of
all Internet users 18 to 34 visited Facebook, MySpace or Twitter in
August, according to ComScore, a Reston-based Internet data research
company. And about 84 percent of 18- to 29-year-olds check social
networking sites at least once a week, according to a May study by the
Pew Research Center for the People and the Press."
Yes, the article is talking about people who don't use social
networking sites, but it also emphasizes that such people are not
typical. It also says that the number of people using Facebook is
increasing.
Reply
Tuesday 03 November
By Dominick Merlino
this is not what I am looking for. I am looking for something
tha I can switch face from onr person to another,
Reply