You don't need to have conducted innumerable adulterous affairs
to properly woo unhappy women in miserable marriages. It's courting happy ones in successful partnerships that takes real skill.
All kidding aside though, sneaking around with a sexual mate who shares her bed with another man is serious business. You're not only risking the obvious repercussions of getting caught
(be it broken bones or a damaged reputation), but assuming the collateral burden of someone looking for you to satisfy a complicated set of physical and emotional needs.
And that means being mindful of more than just the usual Hollywood tip sheet on how to jump out the nearest window or meet at mutually inconvenient locations. So with genuine compassion for all parties in mind, here are some no-brainer tips on how to pursue and enjoy a morally dubious act in the most upstanding way possible.
Let the Relationship Develop Naturally
Carrying on a relationship with a married woman isn't like visiting a backward brothel. You don't stand at a roll call with a bunch of other gamely young studs, as some fantasy MILF takes her pick from the flock and shepherds you away for an evening of complicit, tawdry intercourse.
Usually, the relationship develops organically like any other, in environments that have usurped her actual home as a hotbed for intimacy, like the office, gym or some kind of shared recreational destination. And given that there aren't any laws prohibiting flirtation, don't assume that just because you share some coy glances that she wants to take it to the next level.
Don't Befriend Her Husband
This may seem self-evident, but make sure her husband remains as clandestine a figure as possible. It will help you compartmentalize your role in the affair and keep the entire situation in the realm of fantasy. Or at least that's your excuse when the windfall of accusations and shattered lives comes hurtling toward you like an avalanche.
She's either looking to revitalize something absent in her system, like you're a human relationship vitamin, or using you as a vessel to travel back in time to make sure she didn't leave anything essential behind on her way to domestic reconciliation. You may be looking for a bump in self-esteem and possible bragging rights from the novelty of the arrangement. Whatever your individual motivations, it's best for all invested that your arrangement stay fairly spontaneous and extracurricular.
Treat Her Kindly
All that being said, when in each other's company, treat her the way you'd treat any woman and would hope to be treated in return. Dating another man's spouse is only recommended for individuals mature enough to handle the responsibility. As with any interpersonal relationship, your adulteress of choice wants to know that she's being respected and handled with sensitivity, and that kind of goodwill goes a long way when, as all affairs do, the relationship outlives its necessity.
And hey, who knows, maybe she'll even refer you to one of her friends and you can spend the rest of your adult existence avoiding meaningful connections by intermittently satisfying other people's misdirected longings.
Have you ever dated a married woman? What's your advice for navigating the situation?