Dec 11th 2009 By Asylum Staff
Super Lunch Lady:
Look, someone has to keep the sloppy joes coming. Why not recognize her when the holiday season rolls around?
Apparently, the old days were marred by a crippling lack of self-esteem.
Penguin Awareness Day:
Are your friends and loved ones aware of Penguin Awareness Day? No? Send them this adorable greeting card. Then cross your fingers that they'll remain your friends.
For that special day between a man and his gay robot -- nothing says I love you better than a card.
Metrosexual Father's Day
Thanks, son! I was hoping someone had remembered!
For the jailbird in your life:
Don't settle for Hallmark for loved ones in the big house. Several companies have devised greeting cards specifically for the incarcerated. Just don't stuff a shiv inside one -- the guards will definitely notice.
"Law & Order: Special Victims Unit" Valentines:
Send that special SVU fan in your life one of these hilarious valentines inspired by the highly-popular "Law & Order: Rape Unit," er, "Special Victims Unit." What's more romantic than Detective Munch and the gang? From Brandon Bird