Every Olympics, the powers that be (meaning NBC) choose an athlete or two to build the narrative of the entire games around. This year it's clear that Lindsey Vonn -- she of the swimsuit photos and will-she-or-won't-she injuries -- is one of the anointed. But hopefully the network will also make room for Graham Watanabe, a snowboarder with a decent shot of picking off a medal and a mouth of pure gold.

When asked by a reporter what it feels like to be in the Olympics, the Sun Valley, Idaho, native responded, "Try to imagine Pegasus mating with a unicorn and the creature that they birth. I somehow tame it and ride it into the sky in the clouds and sunshine and rainbows. That's what it feels like."

We found more evidence of Watanabe's unique loquaciousness on his blog. Read on to check it out.


Watanabe on a Fu-Manchu he was growing:
If I don't wax that thing down, it looks like a couple Daddy-Longlegs were smashed on my upper lip! Talk about unruly! Strands crawling into my mouth while I'm eating, while I'm not eating, tangling with my nose hairs.... The only benefit is that if I'm not watching them closely, the hairs take it upon themselves to floss my teeth for me!

Watanabe on finishing second to one of his teammates:
Now, I find myself in that familiar position and can't help but feel like I am Cal Naughton Jr. to his Ricky Bobby. As much as I love seeing my team do well, I think I'm done with the "slingshot." Go fast, Nate, but the Magic Man is coming for you! "Now you see me... now you don't!"

Watanabe noticed some things on a Chinook helicopter ride in Afghanistan:
At one point I looked over to see the gusts assist a nugget of boogs in freeing themselves from Dane's left nostril only to re-plaster themselves to his left cheek. Those little guys definitely had military training, because the stealth with which they crawled at least five inches across Dane's face was professional caliber!

Watanabe welcoming you to his blog:
Aaaand, presenting: The obese! A virtual novella. An autobiographical masterworks in progress. More than you could ever desire to know! You've been warned.

Watanbe on being sore:
Well, I can't say I didn't see it coming, but after getting back in the gym, my body is feeling more abused and bruised than an old man's after a ride in an industrial dryer during a thunderstorm. I'm not sure what that means, exactly, but... I hurt everywhere.