We all know the stereotypes about adultery -- men are always looking for an excuse to cheat while women dutifully keep the home fires burning, right? Not if you're willing to believe Dr. Helen Fisher, a trusted expert in the field of biological anthropology, and the chief scientific advisor for Chemistry.com. And her revelations about the gender divide (including the fact that women like to get laid on the side just as much as men) are based on biology, not hearsay.
Read on about the underrated female libido and the fallacies of modern adultery -- and prepare to get really stressed out about where your girlfriend really goes during those "weekly book club meetings."
Women -- now just as awful as men!
For a long time, Dr. Fisher explains, adultery was a man's game. That's because women depended on their husband for their livelihood and support; if they strayed from the marital bed, they might lose that security. (In previous hunting and gathering societies, where both genders contributed more equally to the family, women were more likely to cheat.)
The modernized economy has changed the stats. Recent surveys show that for those under 40, adultery rates are the same for men and women. "Now, as women are piling back in the job market and regaining what they have lost -- economic power -- they are expressing their sexuality," Dr. Fisher says. "They can risk it."
Why we cheatAnd there's more bad news: Men and women may cheat equally now, but they have different goals. For a dude, it might be about "sex and adventure" -- also known as the novelty of seeing a pair of boobs that do not belong to your wife. For women, adultery tends to signify a deeper dissatisfaction. She's not sleeping around because she wants a one-night thrill; she's probably looking for a whole new life.
"54 percent of men in one study who'd been adulterous said they were perfectly happy with their wife," Fisher says, compared to only 36 percent of women. "Women are more likely to go out when they're looking for something else -- they're looking for a new partner."
The Tiger Woods brain
Dr. Fisher says science supports the stereotype that men are "more able to divide sex and love." It might come down to simple biology. "If the brain is being primed by a lot of testosterone [in the womb], it tends to build a brain that is more compartmentalized," she says. "There's fewer connections between the left and right hemisphere in men, on average."
At the risk of gross oversimplification, your actual brain architecture might make it easier for you to stray -- affairs are simply relegated to a different compartment of the brain. This could all just be a scientific excuse to be a pig, of course. But if it's true, that means certain brains -- like those belonging to infamous golf pros -- sure have a hell of a lot of compartments.
The tables are turning
"I think men and women are in collusion on this matter. Both sexes want to believe that men cheat more," says Dr. Fisher, noting that an entire "cottage industry" has sprung up around the supposed prevalence of the adulterous man. "Women want men to think that they are not cheaters. Men want to think that women are not cheaters. The fact is -- every time a man's sleeping around, he's sleeping around with a woman."
Dr. Fisher's many years of research on sexuality help fuel Chemistry.com, where you can find a girlfriend who will probably cheat on you anyway.


























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Comments:
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Friday 26 February
By KPizzle
This is why I'll never get married. I don't trust women at all (relationship-wise). I've never cheated on my partner, but a few of them ended up cheating (even a kissing another guy I consider cheating). I don't want the bitch to take half of my money when she eventually slips-up on being unfaithful, and if I want a kid, I'll just adopt one or something along those lines.
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Friday 26 February
By T
"every time a man's sleeping around, he's sleeping around with a woman."
I have a gay roommate who can refute this statement. Even adding a qualifier like "men who identify as heterosexual" doesn't fix that sentence. I get what you're trying to do, but maybe be more careful about how you word things.
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Friday 26 February
By Scott Indrisek
I agree with you here. In my defense, this was a quote from Dr. Fisher, so there was no way to "fix" that sentence. The conversation we were having was purely about heterosexual couples, and I understand if this isn't apparent at first glance. Certainly there was no desire to neglect any men who may be happen to sleeping around with another men!
Saturday 27 February
By Observer6
This article is spot on. Being form the U.S., I have spent a 2 years in Norway and let me tell you, women here step out of the relationship just as much, if not more than men. This is a social-capitalist state and women and men have equal earning power, not to mention they are very liberal in their views.
I have witnessed countless women in relationships pick up other men at bars for one night stands. The contrast I see with the U.S. is that it seems to me that American women will step out, feel guilty and then at some point come clean. Here in Scandinavia that will never happen, women who cheat do not seem to think twice about it and its a secret they keep..lots of them.
Relationships in Scandinavia have been very difficult for me to understand...if it happens it happens, keep quiet and go on to the next :)
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Thursday 04 March
By Jake
According to this page here: http://www.2girlsteachsex.com/new/
Woman cheat because men are bad in bed. What do you think about THAT doctor?
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Thursday 22 April
By wdosolaris
A man is a pig if he cheats but what is the woman?
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Thursday 22 April
By wdosolaris
So exactly who are they cheating with then, each other? The dog? A horse? All the above?
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Friday 23 April
By sbw
The word 'cheater' does not distinguish between someone looking for sexual variety, versus someone who has a painfully obvious ZERO sex-life, and wants to find out if his wife is simply being too selfish to share herself with her husband and is being an unfair spokesperson for all of womankind enforcing her opinion that her man doesn't deserve a sex-life when it probably is her opinion alone.
I'm married and I haven't had a sex-life since 1994. I consider myself a good parent, a husband WITHOUT benefits, and stuck in a loveless marriage. But somehow I believe that if I went out seeking for what is missing in my marriage I would be thought of as a Tiger Woods.
Marriage can be such a scam.
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Friday 04 June
By Jill
First of all the title of this Article is "The Science of Adultery -- Why Your Girlfriend Is Probably Cheating. Yet, the article explains men are more prone to cheating (they can't help it, yeah right!) and women cheat because they are looking for a new mate. Am I the only one who interprets that to saying that men cheat because they want to/need to whatever, and women cheat because they are dissatisfied with their current mate? Maybe if men would quit being such pigs and make an effort in their relationships/marriages women wouldn't have to go looking for something better..?? Just a thought-
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