Those nutty Tea Party people were at it again yesterday, this time organizing nationwide protests to demand free nachos for America! OK, the "free nachos" part of that statement is a total lie -- but man, wouldn't free nachos be awesome?

In reality -- although "reality" is a word rarely used to describe the hilariously poor spellers who support the Tea Party movement -- the protests concerned taxation, seeing as how it was April 15 and all. Clever!

Asylum sent correspondents to four Tea Party Tax Day gatherings around the country. Frequent contributor Harmon Leon traveled over 100 miles round-trip to hit protests both at Alameda County Fairgrounds in Pleasanton, Calif., and in San Francisco's Union Square. We also had photographers on the ground at events in Grand Prairie, Texas, and Kingston, N.Y.

Click through the photos to see images from the four gatherings.

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San Fran Body Art Tattoo Expo

The best tattoo artists in the country gathered to make human canvases out of attendees. Shops boasting names like Fonzy's Ink Spot, Johnny Casino's, Mark of the Tiki, Ink Therapy, and Mom's Body Shop left their permanent marks behind on their clients -- and their backs.

San Fran Body Art Tattoo Expo

The Cow Palace was turned into a virtual house of pain, where supportive friends clenched the hands of those in need of a new tramp stamp.

San Fran Body Art Tattoo Expo

Unfortunate tattoo choices were also on display. Getting the "Fart!" tattoo on your rear would be a firm commitment to never getting laid again. This tattoo boldly declares, "I don't want to have sex with another human being ever again, and I clearly don't care."

San Fran Body Art Tattoo Expo

The main event at the Body Art Expo was the big tattoo contest, which was judged by the likes of ink legend Rick "Papa" Walters. "Papa Rick tattoed Jesus Christ," proclaimed the emcee to the (literally) colorful crowd.

San Fran Body Art Tattoo Expo

The judging was done on the basis of clarity, colors, how it heals, and the piece as a whole. Suggestion to Hollywood: The concept of a big-stakes tattoo contest could make for a great Will Ferrell movie.

San Fran Body Art Tattoo Expo

This guy's back proves he's fully committed to the lifestyle. He's the Michael Jordan of the tattoo contest -- a past champ numerous times over. "I got my first tattoo at 15," said the human art display. "It was done with a needle and a bottle of ink. I have 13 tattoos underneath."

San Fran Body Art Tattoo Expo

Scary dudes come on stage shirtless to show off their chest tattoos. A nightmare scenario would be to meet these guys while hearing the phrase, "Welcome to prison!"

San Fran Body Art Tattoo Expo

More scary guys!

San Fran Body Art Tattoo Expo

Each limb was made a separate tattoo category as contestants took to the stage and showed off their decorated appendages for the judges.

San Fran Body Art Tattoo Expo

Now if you're going to be in a tattoo contest in the best leg tattoo category, why not wear shorts? The whole "hopping around stage, holding half your pants up" thing really isn't the most flattering look.

San Fran Body Art Tattoo Expo