We all know that women can be confusing creatures. They say "I'm fine" when they mean "I am about to start bawling -- and I'll never let you forget it." They follow counterintuitive "Rules"-esque guidelines about whose turn it is to call. And on top of all that, they're less likely to sleep with guys they actually like.
We figured there must be a way to cut through the confusing subtext and mixed signals, so we turned to science, in the form of Kevin Hogan, one of the nation's leading body-language experts.
After authoring 19 books on the subject and being utilized as a resource by outlets such as ABC, Fox, and the BBC, we hoped he could help us figure out if that cute girl in the vintage Led Zeppelin tee is into us -- or secretly dying in horror that a goon like us is even trying to talk to her.
Continue reading to hear this body-language expert's interpretation of some common female stances. Keep in mind, all women are different and these interpretations are based within a flirting context.
In this photograph, the woman's right foot is pointed in, taking the weight off her right hip and causing her left foot to support all of her body weight."She's non-consciously drawing attention to her neck, which is a bit of an invitation," says Hogan. "That, combined with her very off-balance posture, could be interpreted that she likes you and trusts you."
This awkward pose may represent some sort of nervousness or aloofness. The woman's legs are criss-crossed at an odd angle and she looks uncomfortable in general. "It wouldn't surprise me if she started to nibble at a fingernail," says Hogan. "She is postured like a young teenager. Her hand to her waist is not for power, but maybe for display (if she's thinking about anything at all)."
Pair this classic, crossed-leg sitting pose with her stiff upper torso, and Hogan says this one's a no-brainer: "She is prepared to be obedient," he says. "Her hands are keeping her posture straight and completely open and her neck is completely exposed. That's as open an invitation as she can give you."
"Her crossed leg indicates she is planning on staying here with you for as long as you like," he adds.
This laid-back stance signifies that this woman is "aggressively flirting with you," our expert tells us. "She shows you her body, but blocks it with her right arm offering you a small hurdle to get past to get the prize." The way she's sitting on her foot represents a sort of vulnerability, as well.
A polite posture like this one may represent a hint of uncertainty. It may not be painfully obvious here, explains Hogan, but this rigid stance could very well mean "she is not comfortable with you."Don't worry about an explosive outbreak, though. "As long as she is sitting as she does in church, she will behave as if she is in church."
This is precisely the kind of body language that lets you know she truly digs you. "She probably isn't allowed to jump over the table and ride you out the door, so she is giving you all the signals possible that now is the time for you to get up and get moving," our expert explains.
He adds, "She has opened her entire body to you. All that's left is for someone to smack you over the head and say, 'Do it!'"
"Her hands are sweaty and she is likely uncomfortable," says Hogan. You haven't set her at ease and she's probably nervous or isn't able to relax. However, notice that the woman's weight is shifted in this position, as well. This unbalanced weight distribution leaves her "completely vulnerable," despite any discomfort she may feel toward you.
In other words: Not all hope is lost.
Either you just said something offensive or your breath is bad. This is obvious because the woman has leaned away from you in addition to crossing her arms. Luckily, "Her feet are still both pointed toward you, forgiving your boorish behavior," explains Hogan.
When a woman is that close to you, it's high time you make a move. "This is the moment you've waited for," Hogan tells Asylum. "She is completely in your personal space and her body simply says, "Take me home.'" Hogan adds, "Her left toe pointing toward you is the final signal."
This is another one of those stances that screams, "I want you!" our expert says. He explains, "She gives full view of her chest, completely opens the door by placing her arm behind her body and handcuffing her other arm. This body is one that wants to be taken, so step up to the plate."
| Yes -- we all reveal things through our bodies. | |
|---|---|
| No way -- The only way to know she's flirting is to hear what she's saying. |
All photos courtesy of Wendy Rose Gould.


























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Comments:
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Thursday 27 May
By Nikki
Wrong. Wrong, wrong, and wrong again. We're uncomfortable, so we change positions. Women, notice how a man said all of this.
Reply
Saturday 29 May
By chris
it would help you a lot if you would see that a woman wrote the article you idiot
Saturday 29 May
By T
Pardon me, Chris. Before you start calling anyone an idiot, notice that Wendy Gould asked Kevin Hogan to express his views. It's Kevin's answers that Nikki thinks is wrong. Now, doesn't that make you feel foolish? LOL!
Thursday 03 June
By Dan
Nikki, that's the point. All of these poses, save for a few aggressive ones, show that the girl is nervous in your presence. Unless you're ugly and creepy, at which point she'd have left by this point, then she is nervous because she likes you and is afraid of what you think of her.
I never made a list of poses and put it down to some exact science like this guy obviously has, but I have always been able to tell on a subconscious level when the girl you're talking to is feeling shy and intimidated as a result of her being very into you.
Saturday 29 May
By EricS
Call me devil's advocate here. Although it was a man that lent his "expertise" in body language, it was a woman that wrote it. And being a woman, would she not have had to agree with the expert in writing this article? I don't know about anyone else, but if I were an author or columnist, I wouldn't write about anything I didn't believe in. So you can look at it that it was a woman in full agreement with a man. So technically, these tips were from a woman. Unless she just wrote this article for money or prestige, then that just tells me she's one of those women that's "me, me, me, give me, give, give me. If I have to, I'll sleep my way to the top".
Just my take.
Saturday 29 May
By Fredrick Wells
I wouldn't know what flirting is if she is doing so!
Saturday 29 May
By ame
how does all most every pose suggest we are for the taking????? really!!!!! don't see that. why doesn't someone analyze man posers
Saturday 29 May
By jeffsberns
I could puke... Give women the benefit of doubt... Repeat this mantra until you fall asleep... "There are no experts." All of this: "And on top of all that, they're less likely to sleep with guys they actually like," "Do it," and,"Take me home." PLEASE!... What does our so called "Expert" have to say about a woman's feet that point outward? Take me to the Drive In and let's make out? I personally think this article takes a cheap shot at women... And for that matter, men as well... Let's get off of this "He scores,""She,scores" Her ass is pointed this way or that way and get down to what it really takes to meet and truly LOVE another human being... All of this FLIRTING is wearing me out... Always with LOVE...
Saturday 29 May
By Fred
Umm, I am going to take a wild guess Nikki and say that men have no trouble reading your body language, providing they know how to undo nnnnnnnn.....knots.
Sunday 30 May
By Bob
Hi Nikki-thanks for the signs I never ever had any trouble understanding women or connecting though every bit helps- Bob P.S. I love women and they love me.
Sunday 30 May
By Dee
Cool rape manual. So, no matter what we're doing with our bodies, it somehow results in a man having a chance?
Love the 'obedient' part, especially; never having felt that for some random dude at a bar.
I'd love to hear from the wife of this 'expert' and see how well he understands her.
Here's a novel idea, guys: if you really can't tell by our face and what we're saying, just ask. Really. More often than not, we'll be impressed by your extraordinary ability to communicate clearly.
Tuesday 01 June
By Zoe
I'm a woman and I do many of these movements and it doesn't mean I'm into anyone at all. We shift due to heels or for other physical discomfort reasons. Just because my hand is behind my back, linked to my other arm DOES NOT mean I'm open and ready. It means I'm comfortable with myself... and maybe just don't give a hoot about you or what you think. Good grief folks - without words this is not a good tool. So guys, listen and watch, to get the best idea.
Friday 11 June
By uncommon sence
This is exactly the kind of thing that can lead a guy into getting thrown into some kind of sexual therapy rehab for making the wrong assumptions.
With a woman, those poses could mean anything and everything.
Their is no science, no rhime and no reason to a womans actions, in some cases no sence, always assume the lease and even if it prevents you from getting laid, it might keep you from getting the wrong impression and possibly getting into trouble.
Maybe in a perfect world, but not in this one!
Friday 11 June
By Mia
Really?? A man is reading a WOMAN's body language?? C'mon
Friday 11 June
By Sadie
I think Dee summed it up best of all!
Friday 11 June
By myr
Forget the stance; the clothes tell you heaps about this woman,casual, instyle, wearing Tom' shoes...she could be any age from 25-55 years old. She has a decent education, is a democrat, secure in her career and this outfit is for casual Friday or the weekend. She is not shy or holds back from much...very cool!
Friday 11 June
By Outraged Post Feminist
"This body is one that wants to be taken"???? Are you kidding me?! I thought that a few years of feminism had gotten us beyond the whole "Oh, her body language told me to rape her."
Saturday 12 June
By Liz
I was thinking the exact same thing as I was reading.
Saturday 12 June
By clg
myr...this outfit actually says i found it in a box marked "80's yard work clothes" in her parents garage. Casual, yes...in style, no...not even close. Democrat...maybe. Work clothes? Not unless you work the overnight shift in Kmart. And 25 years old, I doubt it; more like 70's, living in a trailer park. My mom is in her 60's and wouldn't be caught dead in this hideous ensemble.
Saturday 12 June
By Stan
My fav is when they rip off their clothes,jump on the bed and yell ...get busy mister!
I usually dont notice what position their hands and feet are.
Its about that time I get the hint!!!