Sometimes we read things other than the Internet. Especially, when those things (aka books) make us look smart and have cool cocktails in them.

This summer put down your beer and get creative with your boozy, dark passenger. Drunkenly slurring with a Pabst makes you pathetic, but slurring with a gin gimlet makes you genteel.

You'll be the only one at the pool party sipping an Americano and spewing literary fun facts, while your competition chugs beer or attempts creativity with "Mad Men" cocktails. C'mon guys, Moscow Mules and Tom Collinses were so last summer.

1. Tequila Zombie
"Inherent Vice"
In Thomas Pynchon's newest novel, the main character Doc Sportello, a Lebowski-esque private detective, frequents the Belaying Pin restaurant. Known for its devil-ray filet deep-fried in beer batter and house anchovy loaf, the waitress always recommends Tequila Zombies because, "You'll want to be good and f**ked up by the time this [food] arrives."

Keep reading for the recipe and more literary-infused cocktails.

In a cocktail shaker add: 2 shots tequila, 1 shot apricot brandy, 1 shot spiced rum, 1 shot vodka.
Shake, then add 2 shots grapefruit juice and 2 shots orange juice.
Shake again and strain over ice in a tall glass.
Black out.

2. Americano
"Casino Royale"
While the Vesper martini overshadowed other drinks in the novel and became even more famous in the movie, this was the first cocktail that readers ever heard James Bond order. Originally called the Milano-Torino in Milan, Italy, during the 1860s, it was renamed for its popularity with American tourists during Prohibition.

Fill an old-fashioned glass with ice cubes.
Pour in 1 ounce Campari and 1 ounce sweet vermouth.
Top off with club soda.
Garnish with lemon twist or orange slice.
3. Sazerac
W.E.B. Griffin's "Honor Bound" series
One of the oldest known cocktails, Griffin made it the favorite drink of protagonist Cletus Frade. While the drink's recipe has many variations since its invention in 1830s New Orleans, it commonly includes Cognac, rye whiskey, absinthe and bitters. Now that absinthe is legal in the United States, literature lovers can begin mixing it once again.

Chill an old-fashioned glass by filling it with ice.
In a separate glass, muddle 3/4-ounce simple syrup and bitters together.
Add 3 ounces rye whiskey and stir.
Dump the ice from the old-fashioned glass and swirl a small amount of absinthe in the glass. Swirl it around until the glass is coated, and discard excess liquid.
Fill again with crushed ice.
Add the whiskey mixture to the ice.
Garnish with lemon twist.
4. Gin Gimlet
"The Long Goodbye"
Raymond Chandler didn't include the gimlet in his first draft of the novel. However, after a trip to London, he fell in love with the drink and wrote it in. The novel's popularity caused the cocktail to blow up in the United States. Now it's the drink most associated with this infamous alcoholic writer.

As Terry Lennox tells detective Philip Marlowe in the 1953 detective novel, "A real gimlet is half gin and half Rose's lime juice and nothing else."
5. Mint Julep
"The Great Gatsby"
While the mint julep is most often associated with Southern writers, like William Faulkner (bars would often let him make his own), the drink first gained national popularity after its inclusion in F. Scott Fitzgerald's famous novel.

In a Collins glass, muddle 4-5 mint springs and 2 sugar cubes.
Add 2-1/2 ounces bourbon.
Fill with crushed ice.
Drink as is, or top with water for weaklings.
6. Red Rum
"The Shining"
OK, so this cocktail isn't technically in the novel. However, the phrase is repeated ad nauseam. The lead character drinks himself silly. The author is a famous alcoholic. And after reading it, who doesn't want to drink a little backward murder?

Mix 2 ounces light rum and 1 ounce grenadine in a tall glass.
Add crushed ice and top off with orange juice.
Garnish with maraschino cherry and lime wedge.