Film majors, Hunter S. Thompson enthusiasts and American Indians take note: There's a peyote shortage across America. Don't freak out, man -- it'll all be over in a few hours.

To be fair, the shortage mostly affects the three men in the nation who can legally harvest and sell peyote to registered members of the Native American Church. Those guys just aren't coming up with the amount of peyote buttons they were 10 years ago.

That's right -- there are three men in the country who legally harvest and sell peyote, which may or not be one of the best jobs ever, depending on how much you enjoy providing Native Americans with hallucinogenic drugs for spiritual rituals.

Most ranchers would rather plow the plants under and let their cattle graze, and others lease out their land to oil and gas companies or hunters, who likewise don't care if people can get "the medicine"* they need for their religious practices. You know, because they're squares. Won't somebody please think of all the people who need peyote?!

* Those aren't sarcasm quotes, that's actually what people call it.