It takes a special kind of talent to create a solid kid's show. You have to create the sometimes offbeat material that appeals to the innocent, off-kilter mind of a child. But, you also have to make sure you don't cross that fine line into creepy -- traumatizing them for their entire lives. The creators of these shows failed miserably at that last one.
Check it out, and next time you happen upon a kids show that isn't as disturbing as a Stephen King novel, take time to respect the talent it takes not to horrify babies.
Mark Twain's "The Mysterious Stranger"
What's a surefire way to really freak children out? Introduce them to Satan via claymation.
"Jigsaw"
Children with English accents are about as creepy as it gets. How did they get so disturbingly scary? It's probably due to the BBC's kids programming. Case in point: "Noseybonk."
"The Wiggles"
Even the world famous Wiggles aren't immune from making kids everywhere poop their pants in terror.
"The Electric Company"
Be forewarned, you can never unsee the thing Billy does with his tongue around 00:09. Lick a lolly, indeed.
The Junior Christian Science Bible Lesson Program
Despite its vintage appearance, this creepy L.A. public access show is actually from the '80s. Either way, they can have it back.
"Gimme Gimme Octopus"
The Japanese are also responsible for "Gimme Gimme Octopus." This particular episode ends with a sword-fight homicide.
"Peppermint Park"
So much that is creepy about kid's shows comes back to terrifying puppetry, like what's below. But the whole "blowing bubbles" angle doesn't help.
"E-I-E-I Yoga"
Would you trust this weird hippie guy to watch your kids?
"Boohbah"
Horrifying both the young and stoners who are up from the night before. Are those lumpy scary things the Boobahs? Do not want.


























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Comments:
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Saturday 20 November
By Clem Clambake
That "Gimme Gimme Octopus" show looks like "Cthulu & Friends" or something.
Reply
Thursday 18 November
By Doug M
The Hippie guy is "Out of this galaxy kind of creepy"
Reply
Thursday 18 November
By Paul
Don't forget the final episode of Howdy Doody. Seeing is believing.
Reply
Thursday 18 November
By shawn
Wuth the The Junior Christian Science Bible Lesson Program-no wonder California is so screwed up with Darth Vader is your pastor and Yoda is your choir leader.
Reply
Wednesday 24 November
By Ehph
that puppet looks like Nosferatu
Friday 19 November
By NLITEND
this made my day! lol...
Reply
Thursday 18 November
By frankerin
"traumatized for the rest of their lives"? I really hate that expression, used deliberately to cause eyes to glaze over and screams of "Save the Children", don't think, just "Save the Children". If I didn't think this whole piece was a joke, I would seriously object to the author.
Reply
Friday 19 November
By Kare
You know what Frankerin? I haven't even viewed them yet but that's what came to my mind as soon as I saw this article and read that stupid line.I thought.."traumatized for life" my horse's patoot!
Thursday 18 November
By Wrake
Did the crazy christian puppet show get absorbed by Tim and Eric Awesome Show Great Job? I'm fairly certain the guy working the puppets is now the creepy toothless puppet guy from Tim and Eric, Same voice, Same type of needlessly creepy puppets, same rhyme scheme even! Also i saw "James Quall" or someone like that credited, and Quall is the last name of crazy puppet guy from Tim and Eric.... I knew their was a reason i hated that show!!!
Reply
Friday 19 November
By hotjohnny9000
both guys did this for real before they were recruited by tim and eric for their comedy show (t+egj). i don't know if they realize..
Friday 19 November
By Lita
"The Wiggles" video looked like a recruitment video for future proctologists.
Reply
Friday 19 November
By Claudine
What about the teletubbies? Now that was really bizarre!
Reply
Friday 19 November
By Dawn Castle
the boobahs look like uncircumsized male thingies
Reply
Sunday 21 November
By JeanGrace
They are doing low-impact aerobics @ 2:00!
Friday 03 December
By racheal
isaid the same thing, but you know they also look like hairy nutsacks.
Monday 29 November
By racheal
isaid the same thing, but you know they also look like hairy nutsacks.
Friday 19 November
By Ripper
I.....Think......the.....BOOhbahs......have......taken...over
(What can I do for you BOOHBAH Master)
hhhhhheeeelllppppppppp!!!!!!!!!!!
Reply
Friday 19 November
By vanessa
How did you miss the Teletubbies? Creepy!
Reply
Sunday 21 November
By Sharja
I think you people are creepy and scary, you are looking for any thing like the Lick a Lolly. What did you do slow it down and watch each and every movement? I had to watch it twice to see what you were talking about. This is a ridiculous article and I am surprised you had nothing better to write about.
Reply
Monday 29 November
By SlimGudE
its not each moment its just dude in the beginning licking insanely. the girls don't lick their lollies the way he licks his!