Just take a second to drink that headline in ... In terms of political sex scandals, Berlusconi makes the Bill Clinton affair look like a game of Monopoly.

In court papers it was claimed that Italy's premier, Silvio "Got It Like That" Berlusconi, paid to have sex with women dressed as nurses and police women. And that his aid, former showgirl turned dental hygienist turned regional parliamentarian, Nicolla Minetti, herself under investigation for organizing prostitution (and, it has to said, is quite a looker), staged lesbian sex shows for Berlusconi and his guests.

In a telephone tap transcript in the court documents, a former police officer is heard saying, "Minetti was there with her chest out kissing Berlusconi continuously ... It was a real whorehouse. All the girls were given rings and necklaces."

This revelation is just the latest in a string of sordid sex stories that have dogged Berlusconi since his split from his wife after he attended the 18th birthday party of underwear model Noemi Letizia. But his unconventional political persona isn't merely confined to the realm of kinky parties, saucy role-play and generally socially unacceptable misogyny. He's made more gaffes than Gaffy McGaffington, chairman of the Royal Society of Gaffers, from Gaffingham-on-the-Sea.

And, being us, we've rounded them up for you after the break.

Told Off by the Queen
During the 2010 G20 summit in London, the leaders of the nations posed with Queen Elizabeth for a quick group photo. After the snap Berlusconi shouted out to Barack Obama. The Queen, who was far from amused, turned and said, "What is it? Why does he have to shout?" It really has come to something when the Queen is telling you to shut up.



Calls Obama "Tanned"
During a visit to Russia, Berlusconi said in a press conference that the then newly elected American president had a lot going for him, "He's tall, handsome and has a good tan." No, Silvio, he's black.



Michelle Keeps Berlusconi at Arm's Length
Perhaps unsurprisingly, at the next G20 summit, the Obamas' reception to Silvio wasn't exactly brimming with warmth. Capped, rather sublimely, with a handshake by Michelle Obama that looks more like a hand-off.



Berlusconi Rude and Moany
This footage from a 2009 NATO summit held in Germany shows Berlusconi wandering off talking on his cell phone instead of politely meeting the waiting German prime minister, Angela Merkel, to the laughs of the assembled media. Merkel takes it all in good humor initially, but you can clearly see her becoming more peeved.



Fake Berlusconi
OK, maybe this one isn't real -- but according to today's revelations he does have a thing for women in uniform.