Black Socks and Six Other Totally Ludicrous Subscription Services

The Internet has made life easier in so many ways, but until now we hadn't seen that one truly groundbreaking idea that can really change lives. Billing itself as a solution for men "who never want to worry or think about buying socks again," Blacksocks will send you a new pair of black socks via mail every month. This offer of socks in our mailbox got us wondering how many other mindless...

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When Dads Get Depressed -- Who Says Postpartum Is Just for Women?

The room is near dark except for a sliver of light coming through the curtains from a much-too-bright porch light across the street. Except for a few quick naps, I've been awake for almost 24 hours. I look down to notice the bottle is almost empty. Now it's a competition to see who nods off first. It seemed like a simple fix: Since daycare is obscenely expensive, it would just be better if I...

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Asylum Writer Tackles the McDonald's 'Mc10:35'

Rumored to be gaining a cult following, the Mc10:35 is a combination of a McDonald's Egg McMuffin and a McDouble, to be ordered simultaneously at 10:35, allegedly one of the few times you can order off both the breakfast and lunch menus. After securing both items, you take the egg and Canadian bacon from the Egg McMuffin and put it on the McDouble. Hail the Mc10:35. I've been on a mission...

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How Writing Like an A**hole Gets You a Facebook Fan Group

Many writers don't get very much recognition. Especially those that do a majority of their writing online. In fact, the only time readers seem to take notice of the byline of an article is when they think it's pure excrement and want to make sure they spell the writer's name correctly in the comments when explaining how much of a whore mother they have. So a Facebook group devoted to a...

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Get Dumped? Then Donate Your Ex's Old Junk to Goodwill

Getting dumped sucks. But dumping all the crap from a failed relationship is even suckier. You could always throw out your evil ex's junk, of course. Or you could set fire to it on your front lawn. But just this once, how about handling your breakup like a champ? All this Friday (tomorrow), the Goodwill location in Colonial Park, Penn., will be staging an anti–Valentine's Day weekend...

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How to Get Better Customer Service by Being an A**hole

We've all been subjected to the torture of terrible customer service -- hours on hold just waiting to talk to a breathing human, even if their first field of study obviously wasn't the English language. What do people usually do about it? Nothing. That's why we invited Chris Illuminati, Asylum contributor and co-author of "A**holeology: The Science Behind Getting Your Way and Getting Away...

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17-Year-Old CEO Daniel Brusilovsky's Tips to Stay Ahead of Trends

For most 17-year-olds the choices are limited to another four years of academia or chasing stray carts around the grocery store parking lot. But wunderkind Daniel Brusilovsky has an option C. Brusilovsky spends his free hours writing for Tech Crunch, a Web site that profiles start-up companies, products and Web sites and boasts over 3 million readers. He is the founder and CEO of his own...

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NFL Scout Discusses Life Chasing the Next Big Football Star

For those college football players eligible for the NFL draft, the preparation has already begun for the NFL combine in Indianapolis in February. Every NCAA athlete, from every football program, thinks he has the talent to step onto an NFL field and compete at a professional level. But according to the NFL Players Association, of the 100,000 high school seniors who play football every year,...

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Space Mountain New and Improved -- We Miss the Old Space Mountain

While Disney World was once a wonderland of innovation, the amusement juggernaut could be faulted in recent decades for failing to embrace modern technology, especially when it comes to roller coasters. Take Space Mountain, for example, which recently reopened after being shut down for seven months for updates. You'd imagine in seven months the mouseheads would find a way to actually blast...

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Challenging My Masculinity -- One Writer Dares to Ignore the Maxims of Manhood

Chris Illuminati lives in New Jersey and writes about everything you couldn't care less about. That is his real last name. Guys have rules. Keep an empty urinal between you and another guy, the man of the house always works the grill, etc. Those rules are the reason books like "The Maxims of Manhood: 100 Rules Every Man Must Live By" are published and find success. We men need such...

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