I've frequently been described as a "fat skinny man," that is to say I'm built like a twig except for my gut, which, due to my penchant for malt beverages and rich delicious foods, juts out over my pants. Picture Meatloaf's gut on Mick Jagger's frame. That's me, and my muffin tops. Adding insult to injury, I have virtually no ass to speak of. My pants droop down my backside like the sagging ...