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  • Jutsy
  • Member Since Aug 20th, 2008

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Enter 'State Motto Contest' and Win ... Nothing {Asylum}

Oct 21st 2009 4:35PM Connecticut: all the pretension of New York and Boston combined with the smug satisfaction of not being New York or Boston.

What's the Best Adult TV Cartoon of the Modern Era? {Asylum}

Sep 8th 2009 3:58PM The two funniest, best-written shows aren't even on your cornhole list. Futurama is the best adult cartoon series ever. South Park is second on the list, for being consistent, unlike the Simpsons. I'd also like to add Frisky Dingo into the mix, for all of the Adult Swim adherents out there.

Masterclash Debates Beer Pong Etiquette, Girlfriends in Thongs {Asylum}

Sep 3rd 2009 1:58PM It's Beirut. Beer pong is played with paddles. Philistines.

Grilling Guidance -- Knowing When Your Meat Is Done {Asylum}

Jul 30th 2009 2:22PM Anyone who cooks steak well done should kill themself.

'Watchmen' Reviews Are In -- Is It 'Magnificent' or 'Murky'? {Asylum}

Mar 6th 2009 3:45PM A follow-up: it makes no difference to me whether or not someone likes the movie. It's only the comparison to "The Incredibles" that drives me to drink.

Just to make that point clear.

'Watchmen' Reviews Are In -- Is It 'Magnificent' or 'Murky'? {Asylum}

Mar 6th 2009 3:32PM Wall Street Journal, eh? Any due diligence at that paper, or investigative journalism? Comparing "Watchmen" to "The Incredibles" in that fashion is like saying Shakespeare ripped off "The Lion King" when he wrote Hamlet.

I just wish I could remember if "Watchmen" really DID come out 20 years before "The Incredibles", or if that's just a figment of my imagination...

As an aside, shouldn't the Wall Street Journal be covering things a little more pertinent to the current financial climate? Please endeavor to only report on the grosses of the film from this point forward, WSJ. Thanks. Save your high school newspaper reviews for your online girlfriends.

Guy/Girl Friendships -- Equal-Opportunity Pals or Bad Idea? {Asylum}

Feb 12th 2009 3:54PM When I voted an unhesitating and unvarnished "no", it was Yes - 52%, No - 48%.

Optimistic at best. Realistically, pussy-whipped liars.

Just because Valentine's Day celebrates the best of "true love" and "good human nature", don't get all hand-holdy and buy-the-world-a-cokey. The chick you're "just good friends" with? Laughs at you and would never have sex with you. Yet someday, you're SURE, she'll realize what you two genuinely have, and she'll dump the meathead asshole for you.

It's OK to have biological responses. You can't PC away instinct, no matter how much Oprah wants you to.

*The exception is the homos. Chicks honestly love them, but really wish they could be just a little straight. (Thanks Weezer).

What's the Best Use of a Hit Song in a Movie? {Asylum}

Feb 11th 2009 11:14AM I tortured myself trying to decide between "Layla" and "Stuck In The Middle". An entire generation cannont hear "Stuck In The Middle With You" without vividly, inevitably seeing that scene in their heads, and the "Layla" instrumental is almost as iconic.

Boogie Nights was fantastic, and the music in it excellent, but seriously? That's about as identifiable with the one particular movie as "Wild Thing" is to Major League.

Who Is the Sexiest Sportscaster of 2009? {Asylum}

Jan 29th 2009 6:39PM Where is Rachel Nichols? She's been snubbed! I'd rather have her than any of these options, if I HAD to choose.

Fat Women Have More Sex {Asylum}

Oct 31st 2008 1:55PM Since there is a worldwide epidemic with obesity, of COURSE more fat chicks have sex. There simply ARE more fat chicks. If 75% of the guys are chasing the 25-30% of women who are "slender to normal", and very likely failing, the only thing to fall back on are the plus-sized whatchamacallits. At least when you fall back on a fat chick, you get a nice cushion.